That’s Silly

[TARDIS]

In The Doctor’s Study console room, 

Leela is playing with The Doctor's yo-yo, 

and doing it quite well.

LEELA: 

Doctor? 


Tom: 

Hmm? 


LEELA: 

Can I stop now? 


Tom: 

If you want to. 


LEELA: 

It will not affect This? 


Tom: 

Affect this? No, it's a yo-yo. 

It's A Game, I thought you were enjoying it. 


Leela drops the yo-yo.

LEELA: 

Enjoying it?!

You said I had to keep it 

going up and down,

I thought it was 

part of The Magic. 


Tom: 

Magic, Leela? Magic? 


LEELA: 

I know, I know —

There's no such thing as Magic. 


Tom: 

Exactly. To The Rational Mind nothing is inexplicable, 

only unexplained. 


LEELA: 

So, explain to me how this ‘TARDIS’ 

is larger on the inside than the out.

 Tom: 

Hmm? All right, I'll show you. 

It's because insides and outsides 

are not in the same dimension. 


The Doctor gets two boxes from a cupboard.


Tom: 

Which Box is Larger? 


LEELA: 

That one. 


The Doctor places it on the time console then goes over to Leela with The Other.

Tom: 

Now which one is larger? 


LEELA: 

(pointing away)

That one. 


Tom: 

But it looks smaller. 


LEELA: 

Well, that's because 

it's further away. 


Tom: 

Exactly. If you could 

keep that exactly 

that distance away 

and have it here,

The Larger One would fit 

inside The Smaller One. 


LEELA: 

….that's silly. 


Tom: 

That's transdimensional engineering, a key Time Lord discovery. 


(The TARDIS materialises.) 


Tom: 

This is the exciting bit. 


LEELA: 

What's exciting? 


Tom : 

Seeing what's outside. 


(The scanner shows that what's outside are metal walls and a sandy floor.) 


Tom : 

I don't…. It's metal. 

We've landed inside something metal. 


LEELA: 

But how can we? 

How can The TARDIS be inside something metal? 


Tom : 

One box inside another, 

I just explained it to you. 


LEELA: 

No, not very clearly. 


Tom : 

Well, it's a rather dull subject anyway. 

I wonder where we are? 


LEELA: 

You mean you don't know? 


Tom : 

Well, not precisely, no. 


LEELA: 

You mean you can't control this machine? 


Tom :

 Well, of course I can control it. 

Nine times out of ten. 

Well, seven times out of ten….

Five times. 

Look. Never mind, 

let's see where you are. 


(Leela picks up the Tesh Energy weapon.)

 


Tom: 

You won't need that. 


LEELA: 

How do you know? 


Tom: 

I never carry weapons. 

If people see you mean them no harm, 

they’ll never hurt you. 

….Nine times out of ten. 


(Leela has her knife drawn as she leaves the TARDIS.)