Les Miserables isn't
about The Policeman.
Jamie :
So, you’re sort of like a —
World Secret Police..?
Brig. Lethbridge-Stewart :
Well, no, we don’t actually arrest people — we just investigate.
[Call centre / Tardis]
POLLY:
UK Security Helpline.
This is Polly. How can I help?
Our Lady :
I'm sorry, what?
POLLY:
UK Security Helpline.
How can I help?
Our Lady :
Get me Kate Stewart at UNIT.
This is a code zero emergency.
POLLY :
I don't know what that is, I'm afraid.
Which organisation did you say?
Our Lady :
UNIT. Unified Intelligence Taskforce.
This is incredibly urgent.
The fate of the entire planet is at stake.
POLLY:
Checking for you.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
UNIT operations have been suspended pending review.
UNIT operations have been suspended pending review.
Our Lady :
What? No, it can't have been.
UNIT is a fundamentally vital protection for planet Earth against alien invasion.
POLLY:
Yes, but when did that last happen?
Our Lady :
Now! Right now!
What happened to it?
POLLY:
Just checking.
All UNIT operations were put on hold following financial disputes and subsequent funding withdrawal by the UK's major international partners.
Our Lady :
You're kidding.
POLLY:
Other Armed Forces are available if you can answer a couple of questions to help me best direct your call.
(The Doctor ends the call.)
Our Lady :
We're on our own.
The Austro-Hungarian Empire was the ideal model of a Police State.
It copied (and perfected) the French model refined during the Revolutionary, Napoleonic and post-Napoleonic eras.
It was said of the Hapsburg Empire of Prince Metternich, it was maintained by —
A Standing Army of Soldiers
A Sitting Army of Bureaucrats
A Kneeling Army of Priests
and
A Creeping Army of Informants
This is why I am so interested by the timeliness of the new BBC adaptation of Les Miserables —
And, by Bane knitting —
The Colourful Jester :
It is a far, far better thing that I do than I have ever done.
It is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known...
(Mel comes running in)
MEL:
Never mind the Sydney Carton heroics!
You're not signing on as a martyr yet.
The Colourful Jester :
Go away, Mel. Go away.
MEL:
That trial was an illusion...!
(The tumbril vanishes and the Doctor falls onto the cobblestones.)
The Colourful Jester :
Ow! You've ruined everything!
Run, You Brilliant Girl —
and
BE A DOCTOR
A young Police Constable approaches two squabbling women. Her attitude to policing seems to channel Sgt Cawood from Happy Valley.
SONIA:
She smashed it with a hammer!
JANEY:
Cos you keyed me nearside door!
SONIA:
Because you parked in my spot!
JANEY:
It's not your spot.
There are no spots.
YAZ:
Ladies, please!
Thank you.
Can I suggest a simple solution?
“ Never Ask for Permission, It’s a Complete Waste of Time. ”
— Tony Benn
You pay for her cracked window,
you pay for her scratched door,
and we all agree that parking round here is a nightmare —
But that grown-ups really shouldn't need to call The Police to sort it out for them.
Now, if we're all agreed on that,
there's no need for me to take any further Police Action and we can all get on with our lives.
What do you reckon?
[Police car / Police station]
YASMIN:
I'm just saying,
I am capable of more
than parking disputes.
I am capable of more
than parking disputes.
RAMESH:
And I keep telling you,
Don't run before you can walk.
You're a probationer, Yaz.
Learn The Basics.
From Who? (See What I Did There..?)
— She was sent out to attend the parking incident solo, so she already knows “The Basics of Routine Community-Policing”, well enoughto do it unsupervised, without additional officers or back-up, whilst sleep-walking underwater, and with the lights off for the entire street, as well as the next 3 streets on either side.
She Doesn’t Need Supervision
And They Know That.
Because She’s unpartnered — and out there on her own.
YAZ :
I want to do more.
Can you not get them to give me something that'll test me?
Something a bit different.
RAMESH:
There is something that just came in....
If you want ‘different’....
“For a over a Thousand Generations, The Jedi Knights were the Guardians of Peace and Justice in The Old Republic —”
“We Can Only Protect You;
We Can’t Fight a War for a You.”
“We’re Not Soldiers.”
“Before The Dark Times —
Before The Empire.
But There are Alternatives to Fighting.
You Must Face Darth Vader, Again.
BILL MOYERS:
We downloaded something from your Web site the other day and there you were talking about how you wanted the Jedi to be more than just fighters.
You wanted them to be “spiritual,” but you didn’t say what you meant by that?
GEORGE LUCAS:
Well, I — I guess they’re like ultimate father figures or negotiators.
We downloaded something from your Web site the other day and there you were talking about how you wanted the Jedi to be more than just fighters.
You wanted them to be “spiritual,” but you didn’t say what you meant by that?
GEORGE LUCAS:
Well, I — I guess they’re like ultimate father figures or negotiators.
And — and at this point in time they are —
They’re sent out to negotiate a — a deal.
They help to put forth answers where people are in the middle of a dispute.
GEORGE LUCAS:
They’re aren’t an aggressive force at all.
They try to — Conflict Resolution, I guess, is what you might —
Intergalactic Therapists.
They help to put forth answers where people are in the middle of a dispute.
GEORGE LUCAS:
They’re aren’t an aggressive force at all.
They try to — Conflict Resolution, I guess, is what you might —
Intergalactic Therapists.
“This is an Unexpected Move for Her — it’s too aggressive.”
Ah,
1985 :
