My Dear Will.
You must be healed by now.
On The Outside, at least.
I hope you're not too ugly.
What a collection of scars you have!
Never forget who gave you The Best of Them.
And be grateful.
Our Scars have The Power to remind us that The Past was Real.
We live in a primitive
time, don't we, Will?
Neither Savagenor Wise.
Half-measures are The Curse of it.
Any rationalSociety would either kill me or put me to someuse.
So you Dream much, Will?
I think of you often.
Your Old Friend,
Hannibal Lecter.
"Actually, that was
The Last Time He Ever
Took a Swing at Me."
Jimmy Carr:
It's just so stupid, isn't it?
Beating Your Wife...
I mean, it's Your Wife -
it's like keying Your Own Car!
David Mitchell:
Society just got a tiny bit worse...
Jimmy Carr:
I like to think I can help.
As the fat renders, the tallows float to the surface.
Like in Boy Scouts.
It's hard to imagine you as A Boy Scout.
Keep stirring.
Once the tallow hardens, you skim off a layer of glycerine.
If you would add nitric acid, you got nitroglycerin.
If you then add sodium nitrate and a dash of sawdust, you got dynamite.
Yeah, with enough soap,
one could blow up just about anything.
Tyler was full of useful information.
Ancient Peoples found their clothes got cleaner when washed in a certain point of The River.
You know why?
No.
'Cause Human Sacrifices were once made on The Hills above This River. Bodies burned, water seeped through the wooden ashes to create lye.
This is lye. The crucial ingredient.
Once it mixed with the melted fat of the bodies,
thick white soapy discharge crept into The River —
May I see your hand, please?
What is this?
This is A Chemical Burn.
It'll Hurt more than you've ever been burned —
and You'll Have A Scar.
If meditation worked for cancer, it could work for this. - Stay with the pain. Don't shut this out. - Oh, God! Look at your hand. The first soap was made from the ashes of heroes, like the first monkey shot into space. Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing. I tried not to think of the words "searing" or "flesh". Stop it! This is your pain, this is your burning hand. It's right here. I'm going to my cave to find my power animal. No! Don't deal with this the way those dead people do! Come on! - I get the point! Okay, please! - No! You're feeling premature enlightenment. It's the greatest moment of your life, man, and you're off somewhere missing it! I am not... Shut up! Our fathers were our models for God. If our fathers bailed, what does that tell you about God? Listen to me. You have to consider the possibility that God does not like you. He never wanted you. In all probability, he hates you. This is not the worst thing that can happen. We don't need him! - We don't! I agree! - Fuck damnation, fuck redemption. We are God's unwanted children? So be it! - I'm getting water! - Listen! You can use water and make it worse or... Look at me! - Or use vinegar to neutralize the burn. - Please let me have it, please! First, you have to give up. First, you have to know, not fear, know that someday, you're gonna die. You don't know how this feels! It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything. Okay. Congratulations. You're one step closer to hitting bottom.
"Every time after that -- every time He came back to CHECK on me, it became a lot less about Me and a LOT more about HIM.
This ULTRAMAN started to just sit there.
Sometimes Not Talking.
But, Most of The Time?
Talking, so much Talking.
Dad, it was SO MUCH Talking.
By Our Very Nature, We are Rulers.
We have The Power.
It's OUR Obligation to Rule Over Idiots...
He would just sit there and Talk and Talk.
ALMOST like He had No Actual Real Friends.
Oh! And He was one of thee guys that would repeat A Story he told you only two days ago, because he forgot he told it to you, but when he repeated it he would CHANGE something so you KNOW
He's always Kind of Lying.
You can't even Trust
The Stupid Story.
He would tell me long stories about HIS Group of Super-People and HIS Lex Luthor and How Hard it Was to Be Him and How Bad His Life Was and How Everyone Was Always Challenging Him and How No-one Listens to Him or Really Respects Him Unless He is Killing Them.
And after a while, sometimes, he'd.... cry.
Sob. Blubber. It was soooo awkward.
And after He would cry,
He would ALWAYS Get Angry
and Always BLAME ME for it and Fly Off.
But if He cried, I knew I wasn't going to see Him again for a while.
At least there was that.
So, if I was EVER going to
Make a Break for it....
It was gonna have to be after
A Good Ultraman Cry.
It took me a while.
Maybe longer than I am Proud of.
Then again, I'm STILL not completely sure how long I was in there."
