Monday, 26 September 2022
The Black Sun
Saturday, 14 May 2022
No… No, You Ate Yours.
Richard E. Grant :
Sunday, 6 June 2021
But Even That Extraordinary Physical Feat is Surely NOT The Point of Interest.
"Help us."
Van Helsing :
So it struck you as strange, of course.
HARKER :
Well, clearly, there was someone
trapped in The Castle.
Van Helsing :
No. No. The writing.
"Help us."
HARKER :
It was upside-down.
Van Helsing :
Well, yes, of course,
because whoever wrote it
was obliged to hang that way.
But even that extraordinary physical feat
is surely not the point of interest.
HARKER :
Then what is?
Van Helsing :
What is remarkable, Mr Harker,
what is convenient, is that
The Words were in English.
HARKER :
Oh...
I didn't think of that.
Van Helsing :
Of course not.
You are an English...man --
A combination of presumptions beyond compare.
Proceed.
HARKER :
Well, I knew I had the day to myself,
so I determined to find the room above mine
and see if anyone required my assistance.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
That completes my final report until we touch down.
We're on full automatic, in the hands of the computers.
l've tucked my crew in for the long sleep,
and l'll be joining them soon.
In less than an hour we'll finish
our sixth month out of Cape Kennedy.
Six months in deep space.
By our time, that is.
According to Dr Hasslein's theory of time in a vehicle traveling nearly the speed of light, the Earth has aged nearly 700 years since we left it, while we've aged hardly at all.
It may be so.
This much is probably True :
The men who sent us on this journey are long since dead and gone.
You who are reading me now are a different breed.
I hope a better one.
I leave the 20th century with no regrets.
But one more thing...
If anybody's listening, that is.
Nothing scientific.
It’s purely personal.
Seen from out here, everything seems different.
Time bends.
Space is, boundless.
It squashes a Man's Ego —
I feel lonely.
That's about it.
Tell me, though...
Does Man, that marvel of the universe, that glorious paradox who has sent me to the stars, still make war against his brother, keep his neighbor's children starving?
Are you all right?
Stewart?
Stewart?
Astronaut TAYLOR :
We're in the soup. She's sinking.
Dodge, read The Atmosphere.
Landon, get out a last signal.
Astronaut LANDON :
What signal?
To Earth. That we've landed.
The air's OK.
Blow the hatch before we lose all our power.
It’s no use. The power's gone.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Forget it. Abandon ship.
Astronaut LANDON :
She's sinking.
Going...
Going...
Gone.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
OK. We're here to stay.
Astronaut LANDON :
Well, where are we?
Do you have any notion, skipper?
Astronaut TAYLOR :
We're 320 light years from Earth on an unnamed planet in orbit around a star in the constellation of Orion.
Is that close enough for you?
Astronaut DODGE :
That could be Bellatrix.
Astronaut LANDON :
It’s too white for Bellatrix.
Astronaut DODGE :
You didn't have time to read the tapes.
So you really don't know, do you?
Astronaut LANDON :
What went wrong?
We weren't programmed to land in the water.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
The Question is not so much
where we are as when we are.
We've had enough sleep for a while.
Let's start earning all that back pay.
Dodge, run your soil test.
Got your sensors?
Astronaut DODGE :
Right.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Geiger counter?
Astronaut DODGE :
Got it.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Let's see... One pistol, 20 rounds
ammo, a medical kit, camera, TX9.
We've got Food and Water enough
for three days.
Astronaut LANDON :
How long is a day?
Astronaut TAYLOR :
That's a good question.
Landon... Hey, Landon.
Join the expedition.
Astronaut LANDON :
Sorry. I was thinking about Stewart.
What do you suppose happened?
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Air leak. She died in her sleep.
Astronaut LANDON :
You don't seem very cut up about it.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
It's a little late for a wake.
She's been dead nearly a year.
Astronaut LANDON :
That means we've been away
from Earth for 18 months.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Our time.
You've gone gray.
Apart from that you look pretty
chipper for a man who's 2,031 years old —
I read the clocks :
They bear out Hasslein's hypothesis.
We have been away from Earth for
2,000 years, give or take a decade.
Still can't accept it?
Time's wiped out everything you ever knew.
It's all dust.
Astronaut LANDON :
Prove it.
If we can't get back, it's still just a theory.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
It's a fact, Landon. Buy it.
You'll sleep better.
Astronaut DODGE :
Nothing will grow here.
There's just a trace of carbohydrates.
All the nitrogen is locked into the nitrates.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
No dangerous ionization?
Astronaut DODGE :
No.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Well...
If there's no Life here, we've got just 72 hours to find it.
That's when the groceries run out.
Let's go.
Astronaut DODGE :
Which direction?
Astronaut TAYLOR :
That way.
Astronaut DODGE :
Any particular reason?
Astronaut TAYLOR :
None at all.
Come on...
Everybody all right?
Water check.
Eight ounces.
Astronaut LANDON :
It doesn't add up.
Thunder and lightning,and no rain. Cloud cover at night.
Astronaut DODGE :
That strange luminosity, yet no moon.
If we could just get a fix.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
What would that tell you?
I've told you Where You Are and When You Are.
Astronaut LANDON :
All right, all right.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
You're 300 light years
from your precious planet.
Your loved ones are dead and
forgotten for 20 centuries.
20. Even if you could get back, they'd think you were something that fell out of a tree.
Astronaut DODGE :
Taylor, quit riding him.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
There is just one reality.
We are here and it is now.
You get hold of that,
or you might as well be dead.
Astronaut DODGE :
I'm prepared to die.
He's prepared to die —
Doesn't that make you misty? Chalk up another victory for the human spirit.
Clue me in on something, will you?
Why did you sign on for this trip?
You volunteered. Why?
Never mind. I'll clue you in. You were
the golden boy of the class of '72.
When they nominated you,
you couldn't turn it down.
Not without losing your all-American image.
Astronaut LANDON :
Climb off, will you?
Astronaut TAYLOR :
And the glory. Don't forget that.
There's a life-size bronze statue
of you standing out there somewhere.
Probably turned green by now
and nobody can read the nameplate.
But never let it be said we forget our heroes.
Astronaut LANDON :
Taylor, climb off my back.
And there's one last item. Immortality.
You wanted to live for ever, didn't you?
Well, you damn near made it. Except for me and
Dodge, you've lived longer than anyone ever born.
And with our lovely Lieutenant Stewart dead,
it looks like you're the last of the line.
You got what you wanted, Tiger.
How does it taste?
Astronaut LANDON :
OK. You read me well enough.
But why can't I read you?
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Don't bother.
Astronaut LANDON :
Dodge, there. He's not like me at all.
But he makes sense.
He'd walk naked into a live volcano if he thought
he could learn something that no other man knew.
But you... You're no seeker.
You're negative.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
And I’m not prepared to die.
Astronaut LANDON :
I'd like to know why not.
You thought life on Earth was meaningless.
You despised people.
So what did you do? You ran out.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
No. It's not like that, Landon.
I'm A Seeker too. But My Dreams aren't like yours :
I can't help thinking somewhere there has to be something better than Man. Has to be.
Astronaut DODGE :
Taylor, over here.
Life.
Where there's one, there's another.
And another and another.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Let's find 'em.
Astronaut DODGE :
Skipper.
Look.
Scarecrows?
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Let's see.
To hell with the scarecrows.
Whoo-hoo.
Hey. Yay. Yay.
Ah.
Ah-hoo.
Whoo. Whoo.
Ah.
Taylor.
Look at this.
Taylor, look.
They didn't leave much, did they?
Well, at least they haven't tried to bite us.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
Blessed are the vegetarians.
Astronaut DODGE :
They look more or less human,
but I think they're mute.
Astronaut LANDON :
We got off at the wrong stop.
Astronaut TAYLOR :
You're supposed to be the optimist,
Landon. Look on the bright side.
If this is the best they've got around here,
in six months we'll be running this planet.
Smile.
Which one was wearing the strange clothes?
This one.
Will he live?
I don't know.
This beast has lost a lot of blood.
- There's no probe here. Find one.
- Yes, sir.
This place is dirty, Doctor.
Doctor, these animals are dirty.
They stink. They carry diseases. Why aren't
they cleaned up before they're brought here?
- You don't sound happy in your work.
- l'm little more than a vet in this laboratory.
You promised to speak to Dr Zaius about me.
I did. You know how he looks
down his nose at chimpanzees.
But the quota system's been abolished.
You made it. Why can't I?
What do you mean "made it"?
I'm an animal psychologist, that's all.
We have no authority.
You do all right getting
space and equipment.
That's because Dr Zaius realizes our work has value.
The foundations of scientific brain
surgery are being laid right here
in studies of cerebral functions of these animals.
They're still dirty, doctor.
And their bite is septic.
There. Look at that.
Hold his jaw.
Good morning, Dr Zira.
Morning, Julius.
How's our patient?
No change. The minute you open
the door, he goes into his act.
Well.
And what do we want this morning?
Do we want something? Come on. Speak.
Come on, speak.
Do we want some sugar, Old-Timer?
You could get hurt doing that, doctor.
Don't be silly.
He's perfectly tame.
They all are, ‘til they take a chunk out of you.
Well, Bright Eyes. Our throat feeling better?
Still hurts, doesn't it?
See? He keeps pretending he can talk.
That Bright Eyes is remarkable.
He keeps trying to form words.
You know what they say —
Human see, human do.
Tuesday, 20 April 2021
From Hell’s Heart, I Stab at Thee
Trapped forever with a raging madman at your throat until time itself came to a stop.