Why You Should Look Forward To The Menopause | Fleabag Series 2
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Yes!
I need some help up here!
Oh, that was exciting.
Oh, I'm so proud of you girls.
Oh, you can't hear me --
Okay.
(Puts on a Headset)
Okay.
(The Women are intentionally ignoring him.)
Why The Aggression
Is it your Time of The Month?
The Other Widow :
I don't get my period, dipshit.
I don't have a uterus.
Or ovaries.
Yeah. That's What Happens when
The Red Room gives you
an involuntary hysterectomy.
They kind of just go in and they rip out
all of your reproductive organs.
They just get right in there
and they chop them all away.
Everything out, so you can't have babies.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Okay, okay.
The Other Widow :
Okay!
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Okay!
You don't have to get
so clinical and nasty.
The Other Widow :
Oh, well, I was about to talk about
fallopian tubes, but okay.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
It means so much to me
that you came back for me.
The Widow :
No. No. You're gonna tell us
how to get to The Red Room.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Look at You. All Business.
The Widow :
Trust me, this isn't Pleasure.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Little Natasha, all indoctrinated
into The Western Agenda.
The Widow :
I chose to Go West to become an Avenger.
'Cause they treated me like Family.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Really? Family?
Well, where are they now?
Where is that Family now?
The Widow :
Tell me where The Red Room is.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
I have no idea. Okay?
The Widow :
Come on.
You and Dreykov were like...
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Dreykov?
The Widow :
Yeah.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
General Dreykov, My Friend, huh?
Gives me Glory...
Soviet Union's First
and Only Super-Soldier.
I could have been more famous
than Captain America.
Then he buries me in Ohio
on that stupid mission.
Three years!
So Tedious, boring me to tears.
(Yelena glares in his direction)
No offense.
Then puts me in prison
for the rest of my life. Why.
Why? Why would he put me in...
You know why?
'Cause maybe I want to talk about
The Withering of The State.
Or maybe I don't like his hair or something
and I say something casually about that.
Maybe, you know,
I want The Party
to feel actually like A Party
instead of this sourpuss
organization.
But instead, no.
He puts me in prison
for the rest of my life.
He just runs off and hides --
I'm not even the one
who, uh, you know...
I'm not The One Who
Killed His Daughter.
The Other Widow :
Can we throw him out the window now?
The Widow :
I think we should wait till
we get to a higher altitude.
The Other Widow :
All right.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Lets go ask Melina.
The Widow :
Wait, Mom Melina?
We thought she was dead.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
You cannot kill
A Fox that swift.
The Widow :
What?
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
She was The Scientist,
The Strategist. I was The Muscle.
She worked directly for Dreykov
far more than I ever did.
The Widow :
Wait. Are you telling me that Melina
is working for The Red Room, present day?
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
She works remotely outside St. Petersburg.
The Other Widow :
I don't think we have enough fuel
for St. Petersburg.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
No, we're good.
We'll make it.
The Other Widow :
Okay.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
You should've brought
the Avengers' superjet.
The Other Widow :
I swear, if I hear one more word from him,
I will kick him in the face.
The Widow :
He's The Worst.
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Natasha.
Natasha. Natasha.
Come here, I want to ask you something.
Come, it's important.
The Widow :
What?
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Did He talk to you about me?
The Widow :
What?
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Did He talk to you about me?
You know, trading War Stories?
The Widow :
Who? What are you talking about?
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Captain America.
My Great Adversary in this
theatre of Geopolitical Conflict.
Not so much A Nemesis.
More like a contemporary,
you know? Coequal.
I always thought there was
a great deal of mutual respect...
The Widow :
Wait. You haven't seen
either one of us in 20 years
and you're gonna ask me about you?
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
What is with this tension?
Did I do something wrong?
The Widow :
Is that a serious question?
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
I only ever loved you girls.
I did My Best to make sure
you would succeed, to achieve
Your Fullest Potential,
and everything worked out.
The Widow :
Everything worked out?
Red Guardsman
(a.k.a., "Dad") :
Yes. For you, yes.
We accomplished
Our Mission in Ohio.
Yelena, you went on to become
The Greatest Child Assassin
The World has ever known.
No one can match
your efficiency,
your ruthlessness.
And Natasha, not just a spy,
not just toppling regimes,
destroying empires
from within,
but an Avenger.
You both have killed
so many people --
Your Ledgers must be
dripping, just gushing red.
I couldn't be more
proud of you.
The Other Widow :
Okay. You can... No.
Let go of me now.
You smell really bad.
So, are we there yet?
