Credo Mutwa's Initiation

Credo Mutwa's Initiation - 

Narration by Credo Mutwa

Bab' Credo Mutwa takes us through 

his initiation as Sangoma through 

The Art of Storytelling. 

Credo is not reading this story 

but he is telling The Story live, 

that is The Power 

of The Guardian of 

The Earth Mother. 

This audio book is a true gem 

and we want to be part of the people 

that archive it on our platforms.

and when there came the day when mine

placed the the port of initiation upon my head

as a first step to undergoing training as a sangom a new world was to open

its arms to me the hidden africa which even at that time was beginning to

slowly vanish a new world was opened to me

new vistas of knowledge backhand to me like distant mountains

i began to learn about our people i began to learn about

the ancient law i was told many things

as i went through the rituals of

initiation in africa when you are an initiate

you must obey your teachers without question you must

never talk back to them you must gather firewood in the forest and bring

it to you to the place of initiation you must never think of anything

outside the circle of initiation

you had to dance dance strenuously in order to communicate with your body

to communicate with your muscles to communicate with your mind

minor told me that when a person dances

he or she speaks to every vein and atari every joint

and every length of muscle within his or her body above

all she said you receive power from the earth our mother

power which flows from the deep underground into your feet

and up your spine and through the top of your head that is the power of the sangom the

person of the drum

i underwent steaming in a special skimming heart

which was called easy food and after each steaming i

i had to run out into the cold and roll upon the dewy grass

especially when it was mid-winter when snow lay upon the summits

of the great dragonsback mountains of the west of zululand my

aunt and other sangomas told me to steam myself

and then to run out into the cold and roll on the ground

your body must receive benefit from two

great powers of zamasu

heat and cold must both claim you like girlfriends

and you must dance and dance and remove all the the evil sweat from

inside you

and it was so i underwent internal parts i used to drink

medicine each morning a large quantity to fill my stomach with it

and then using a feather to tickle the back of my throat bring it back up again i used to undergo

enemas that would have made an elephant to run away screaming and have you ever had

a traditional zulu enema it's done with a large cow horn which is pierced

at the tip the whole shebang goes into your bags passage sometimes it's

equipped with a big leather bag to hold the rest of the medicine

which is poured in with a calabash and you can just hear it clogging into

your intestines and after that you must be a good runner to run out of the heart and

into the bush and then you know what will happen it would seem

as if every bowel inside your stomach has suddenly escaped through your rectum

like a snake we were forbidden certain foods

but we had to eat certain foods and at the back of the head of every one

of us initiates there was a loop of beads called the the loop

of bergalinez and we had to go from village to village

begging for food begging for grain it was part of the ritual of self

debasement that is part of our initiation

and we were told to meditate to seek the hidden power

of eternity to seek the hidden force that lies hidden amongst the stars

we call this the hidden bride

now what is this power the power comes to you in a strange way

while you are dancing you dance and you dance in a circle

striking your feet friendly against the ground and kicking your feet high you must kick your feet high if you

are redwater you must shake every inch of your body

and when the dancing is at its height

a strange spell falls over you it is as if you are no longer dancing

anymore it is as if you are floating in the air it is as if you are one with the earth

and the sky at the same time and you dance and you dance and then you will feel a very strange

thing bursting up from the small of your back

it is like it is like a pot full of hot water that suddenly jets

up from the small of your back between your buttocks right up your

spine towards the top of your head where it explodes into a mysterious space

and seems to float on and on and on towards the stars your vision

changes your mind suddenly seems to fly

you are covered with sweat but you don't feel any pain

as you dance and dance and dance and dance sometimes the powerful force of the

hidden one the new ncumu

as it is really called will come to you a second time

and you will suddenly feel a part of you living your body and you will see

yourself in the air lying helplessly on your back

while the other you dances like a maniac beneath you

and here this other mysterious you which is lying about the usu dance

in the air will float away into

regions of eternal peace i can't describe them any other way where you feel as if you

are one with every animal every tree

every river and every stream and mountain that there is on this earth you

feel a certain unity with creation and when you have fallen

down you want to get up and do it again but your weakened

human body can no longer bear the strain and you just lie there with your

face close to the sand gasping hard like a lost fish

to breathe

one day after dancing almost through exhaustion

was ordered by my other teacher fella pagat to go into the heart

and then as i knelt

inside the heart and initiate is not allowed to lie down unless so ordered by his or her

teacher when i was kneeling inside the heart

they came what i can only call a strange explosion inside my head

and then like a silver fog a strange and totally

inexplicable best of joy filled me

i did not know what i had to be happy about my body was aching every muscle was

protesting but i was suddenly filled with this great joy a joy so intense

i felt i could i wished i had the arms long enough

to embrace the whole world i i felt i felt

i felt one but yet many i felt i was one human being

and yet i was many many more and i suddenly felt in my heart

apart from the intense joy i felt a deep sorrow

i had people crying far far away i had

people thousands of them laughing

far far far away and when teacher

mine and her friend fella pagat entered the heart later

i went i crawled on my hands and knees over to them and i said

my cause that is what an initiate must say

great kings we refer to our ancestral spirits

and to those who teach us as great sovereigns and so i said to my night and

fella pagati makos

great kings lions of the world

look at his eyes said fella pagat look at the stupid ones

crossed eyes miner looked at me and said

what's wrong with you have you been stealing our beer in the dark while we were away

i spoke with downcast eyes no my aunt you know that i

i do not touch fear which is unfortunate said fella pagati

testily if you could get nice and drunk i would have the privilege of

kicking your ass now what's up with you why are you looking as a ps if you just made love

for the first time i do not understand great one

i said in reply oh you don't understand do you

what do you hear what do you feel minor ask she was always a serious woman

great mother i said i feel a stupid joy i feel

i could run outside and embrace that tree or that cow grazing next to it

of course said mine tell him fella pagat what is this that

he feels fella pagati

leaned back against the glass wall of the heart and his

his blurry eyes mocked me from under the shade of his charcoal

skin head he said for the first time christian boy

you are experiencing something that your people talk about

what is it great one you are experiencing love fat little

bastard you christians talk a lot about love but

when it comes to you you don't know what it feels like tell tell us what do you feel

great one as i have said i replied i feel like embracing everything outside

this village i feel like embracing both of you

but i hear people crying in my ears and i hear people laughing

also what is this am i going mad oh it would be a great help to me if you

could go mad said pagat what you are feeling boy

is love and what you are hearing boy are the cries of millions of people

who died tragically long ago and who died with their lives

unfulfilled what you are hearing christian boy are the sounds of happy souls who lived

this this earthly life to the full and who died

peacefully but great father i said

i why do i feel as if i should embrace everybody

because you are everybody that is what a true sangwoma should be

you should feel that you are everyone and anyone you are a white man

a black man a a colored man you are an indian

you are a priest you are a thief you are you are everything now you are a true

sangoma you have taken the first step towards what we call

to be one with the land listen again listen again sit still

and listen stupid i listened

this is

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so [Music]

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so

foreign [Music]

[Music] at first i had nothing and then i

had going as a far far far into the distance

sounds animal savage sounds sorrowful

sounds ecstatic sounds i hate sounds of

lions mating in the bush i had the sounds of crocodiles rejoicing

in the rivers sounds with which i was familiar i had sounds of beds

and then i had the distant growls the roars

of unknown animals roaring into the very distance

of time and then i heard something

a sound so incredible that i would lack words to describe it

imagine my friends a roaring fire a huge fire a thunderous

fire a fire

the like of which no one has ever seen

it was it

it was a great fire i could hear the crackling of huge

flames i could hear flames leaping high into the air and splashing

down again with huge roars great one what is that

i asked stupidly you are listening to the sound

of the sun said pagat

what you are hearing are the fires of the sun the fires that cause creation to be

listen again listen

i listened again and this time it was a familiar sound

the swish swishing of great waves

they cry the screaming of sea beds

and then strange sounds of mighty animals

i hate them not knowing what they were and i was to learn many years later

that these were whales the sounds that they make in the depths of the sea

[Music] it was it was

it was magic it was pure golden madness it was totally

insanity i heard the sounds of mighty waterfalls cascading in the centers of forgotten

forests i heard the voices of people happy people little people

hunting in the forest i heard the voices of bantu people speaking in languages that

i knew i heard the voices of other people

in a far far away lambs

smells assailed my nostrils the smell of fire

primitive primeval fire fire hot enough to melt

metal into vapor i smelt the sea

i smelled desert the harsh smell of unwatered sand in my nostrils

i smelt birds i smelt animals i even smelt the ants under foot

i was one with all created things for one magical moment

you must sleep said mine you are ordered

to sleep she told me to prepare

a heavenly brew she pointed out a calabash which contained a powdered

bark of a certain tree and she told me how to to boil water to take

a pinch of the powder and pour it into a small clay pot

and then to pour the boiling water onto this and to let it draw

i did as she commanded and then she said you are to take this drink

the moment it gets warm enough to to swallow

and then you are going to go to sleep tomorrow morning

you are to report to me any dream that you have had do you

understand me i said mako's imam

great king mother

they left the heart and i was alone in the gathering darkness

with a prayer to the seven winds of heaven with a prayer directed to each one

of the cardinal points of the earth i lighted the ritual lamp

and i poured snaf all around that lamp as it set on the on the down

floor and then to each one of the cardinal points i offered a white bead

and then i unrolled my sleeping mat

closed the entrance of the heart and then went to sleep

under a jackal skin blanket

i was assailed by a storm of visions and dreams that night

first i dreamt myself walking upon grassy plain

in a land i could not identify the land certainly was not africa

because the trees in that land were tall very tall like pine trees in appearance

out of nowhere they suddenly imaged four furious leopards

and they began chasing me i ran at first fled before the mighty

beasts and then somehow i suddenly lost my power to walk i found myself moving on my knees like a

trying to get away from the animals one of the animals appeared before me

a golden beast of great ferocity its eyes burning into mine it

came at me and seized me by the throat and i actually felt blood gushing out of

my mouth the other beasts closed in i felt my body being torn apart

i felt the beasts dragging my mutilated body in all directions

and i screamed and screamed and screamed

suddenly i was together again

it was as if some force some power had brought me back together again and

sewn me up like a ragdoll and the four lepers were still there

hungry spotted monsters with burning eyes

but this time they were no longer devouring me they were heading me like a goat

in a certain direction and there on the side of a mountain i saw a

huge hole and the leopards butted me like

goats forcing me to jump into the hole and inside the hole

i met a gigantic woman she was huge

she was big and she lay on her left side

and she called me and told me to come and to drink milk like a little calf

from one of her monstrous breasts i remember how she pushed the breast

into my my mouth i felt the huge nipple between

my lips the warm nourishing milk i felt

like a baby again i felt protected loved cherished you must be

strong said the huge woman the load that you are going to pay is

very very great and then she stood up

she was a and naked without a single piece

of animal skin on her she wore no beads nothing she was

she was big like a mountain she told me follow me

meekly i followed her in the dream the movement of a huge buttocks

mesmerizing me the rubbing together of a huge vice paralyzing me

and then she stood aside and ordered me to go into the hole

this time it was a cave or rather a tunnel through which i had

to go go with courage she said

and i was going through this dark tunnel when a big dog suddenly came out of the

darkness straight at me it gripped me by the right arm and

pulled me towards it but something told me do not be afraid

if you fear you shall perish if you show courage you shall survive

and the dog pulled me into a huge carving and there i

saw many campfires lighted the carving was like

no other cave i'd ever seen in my life before it was huge

and in the carving were hundreds of unbelievably old men

and women a group of them called me to their fireside

and they told me things that i did not understand

i remembered what they were saying while i was dreaming but when i woke up

i forgot every weight of what had been spoken to i woke up

drenched in sweat the dream of vision or call it what you

will was so had been so vivid so overpowering

a few days later it read the dream came back again

and there were no leopards this time no hungry beasts with burning eyes of

liquid gold there was just this huge woman who smelled of

sweat and of woman smell

this time she was bleeding between the legs

i could see the blood coming out from below her stomach

she sat in a puddle of blood i was shocked i had heard about

women menstruating but i'd never seen something like this

and the woman said come to me come boy come here kneel down before me

she dipped her finger in her blood and she shouted the finger in my mouth

and she said you must taste the mother of creation

get here inside you be with her at all times

once more she dipped the finger in her blood and pushed it between my lips

i felt its saltiness its stickiness then

she said i said mom she said

the world is sick i am sick you must find medicine

to cure the world i did not understand what she was saying

and once more she shepherded me into the huge cave and they

were no longer many grey wrinkled people but angry warriors

and they seized me and threw me onto a flat stone and one of them drove what looked like a

knife made entirely out of stone into my chest i felt intense pain

and i felt myself become weaker and weaker and weak and

i had a voice speaking in a classical zoolo saying

in death there is repent

in re-death there is death a second time

that which goes away shall come back

and that which arrives shall go away

when i finally came alive if i may use that expression

i found myself still lying on this flat rock in the dream

and i was young healthy virile and there wasn't

a trace of sickness in me at all

you