Special Agent Dale Cooper :
What does BOB want?
MIKE :
He is BOB! Eager for fun!!
He wears a smile --
.... Everybody RUN!
Lucifer enters in an office to talk to God Johnson.
Lucifer:
Well, hello, God.
God Johnson:
Hello, My Son.
Lucifer:
Right, yes, I suppose that would be the standard way to greet your children.
Nice touch.
God Johnson:
What can I do for you?
Lucifer:
Well, it's what I can do for you that's exciting.
See, I can reveal the truth about the Supreme Being you've chosen to impersonate.
I bet you wanted to be God because He's Benevolent, All-Powerful, yada yada.
But in actual fact, He's a dick.
God Johnson:
Look, if you want to be angry with me, you just go right on ahead.
I can be anything you need me to be.
Lucifer:
Right, enough of this idle chit-chat.
Time to tell you what the charade's really about.
What do you desire? Hmm?
To avoid a vengeful ex-wife? Years of back taxes? What's your game?
Lucifer is using is power on God Johnson, it’s not working.
God Johnson:
Is this a staring contest?
'Cause, you know, I'm pretty good at those.
Lucifer:
How is this possible?
Oh, right, yes, I bet you're on some really amazing drugs, aren't you?
If so, share-zies.
EXT. DAY
In The City of Big Whiskey, Wy.,
The Long, Hot Summer of 1881
(LITTLE BILL is walking across the porch of the sheriffs office towards a waiting wagon.)
LITTLE BILL
Give these keys to the conductor.
(hands keys to wagon driver)
Tell him he can loose old BOB's cuffs as soon as he's outside the county.
DRIVER
Yep.
BOB
Got my pistols?
LITTLE BILL
(hands BOB a pistol with the barrel bent over)
I guess you know Bob that if I see you again I'm just going to
start shooting and figure it's self defense.
(BOB stares at LITTLE BILL as the wagon pulls away. As it does so we see BEAUCHAMP standing in front of the sheriffs office.)
LITTLE BILL
I didn't steal your biographer.
He's staying on his own account.
BOB :
Well, he can go stuff himself as well, can't he.
(He begins to scream from the back of the wagon)
A plague on you!
A plague on the whole stinking lot of you,
without morals or laws!
You got no laws!
You got no honour!
It's no wonder you all emigrated to America, because they wouldn't have you in England!
You're all a lot of savages, that's what you are.
A bunch of bloody savages!
A plague on you.
I'll be back!
(we see the women gathered on the porch watching BOB leave town)
ALICE
Nobody's gonna come. Not after what Little Bill done to that Englishman.
SKINNY
Delilah, them tables ain't clean. Can't you get them clean?
Maybe if you'd cover up that face a little somebody might want to hump with you and you wouldn't have to do all that cleaning.
(offhandedly)
What do you call them things you cover up your face with?
FAITH
A veil.
SKINNY
Yeah, a veil. Get a veil.
ALICE
Rains coming.
SKINNY
Thank God.
