Showing posts with label five. Show all posts
Showing posts with label five. Show all posts

Friday, 22 February 2019


Our Lady :
Poor Tim Shaw.

The Wannabe Leader Who Has to Cheat Because He Knows He's Unworthy.

See, that's why I know you won't detonate.
Although, you could prove me wrong cos we're all capable of the most incredible change.

We can evolve while still staying true to who we are.
We can honour who we've been and choose who we want to be next. 

Now's your chance. 

How about it?

Who are you?

Our Lady :
Yes. I'm glad you asked that again.
Bit of adrenaline, dash of outrage,
and a hint of panic knitted my brain back together.

I know exactly who I am.
I'm The Doctor.

Sorting out Fair Play throughout The Universe.
Now please, get off This Planet while you still have a choice.

I Choose to Win.

(Tzim-Sha presses an activation button, and a few moments later drops his faceplate and starts to scream in pain.)

Our Lady :

Sorry. I removed those nasty little things from my friends - 
Swiss Army sonic, now with added Sheffield Steel 

- And I implanted them back in your creature.
Your transference wasn't just data, it was physical.

You got everything transferred to you, including FIVE tiny bombs.

You had a choice.
You did this to yourself.
Go Home.

Our Lady :

They'll be writing operas about our pointless deaths if we don't take drastic action right now.

The Damsel :

We're about to die?

Our Lady :

Oh, sorry, Yaz, I forgot you were there.
All going to be fine.
FIVE systems down, six minutes left on life support.
Are we doing this or what?

Our Lady :

Electromagnetic pulse. Basically fried their systems.
I reckon we've got about FIVE minutes before they reboot and recover.
See? Brains beat bullets. Come on.

Our Lady : 
How long did it take you to build this hotel?

FIVE years. 
We have FIFTEEN [ 5 +5 + 5 ] of these hotels throughout The World now.


Two life-pods, portside and starboard.
Maximum FIVE per pod.
We're just within our occupancy limit.


Mum's Right.
This is Our Home.
We Stay.

Our Lady :
If you stay, you'll die.


Go to the house.
Get anything essential, and get back here.

The Damsel :
I'll help you.

(Manish walks out to meet The FIVE Horsemen.)

The Damsel :

Hmm. Antique lamp.
Section triple nine double FIVE slash seven. [ #57 ]


Ten percent? 
They want us to be grateful that ten percent of people get to work?
What about the other ninety percent?
What about our futures?

Because without action, 
next time it will be seven percent, then FIVE, then one. [ #57 ]

Who dares interfere with this trial?
Thirty FIVE [ 5 X 7 ] witches we have tried,
and still Satan surrounds us.
We shall not be stopped!

The Elder :
Hey, Doc. I've done the old Pendle Witches Walking Trail.
Nobody ever mentioned Bilehurst Cragg.
Never heard of it. 

And she's killed thirty FIVE [ 5 X 7 ] people.

Our Lady :
Quite a blast, that.
Haven't had a hangover like this since the Milk Wars of Keston FIVE.

The Elder :
I've always fancied the idea of Norway.
What bit's this?

Our Lady :
Don't know.
(eats some soil)
But twenty FIVE miles away, 
there's an alpaca farm,
and gift-shop with a very low TripAdvisor rating. Soil?

The Elder :
I'll give it a miss, ta.

The Damsel :

You had a grandmother?

Our Lady :

I had seven, but Granny FIVE,
[ 57 ]
my favourite, used to tell me about the Solitract.
Cos in The Beginning 
- pre-Time, pre-Everything - 
all The Laws and elements and nuts and bolts of The Universe were there.

Light, Matter, Maths, and so on.

But they couldn't fit together properly, 
because The Solitract was there.

The Damsel :
So what is the Solitract?

Our Lady :
A consciousness, an energy.
Our Reality cannot work with Solitract energy present.

The most basic ideas of The Universe just get ruined.
Think of it like a kid with chicken pox
- nuclear chicken pox -
who wants to join in but always ends up infecting everyone else. 

Our Universe cannot work with The Solitract in it.

The Damsel :
Your gran told you this as a bedtime story?

Our Lady :
Only when I had trouble sleeping.

So, what did Our Universe do? 

It managed to exile The Solitract to a separate, unreachable existence.

The Solitract Plane.

And suddenly, 
Everything Makes Sense.

The Universe could finally work because The Solitract had been removed.

The Damsel :
Hang on.
Are you saying we're now on the Solitract plane?

Our Lady :
I wish I wasn't but I think I am.
I'm scared. Are you scared?
I'm genuinely terrified!

The Damsel :
This is a separate exiled universe that is also a consciousness.

Our Lady :
That's what Granny FIVE said.

A Conscious Universe.

She also said that Granny Two was a secret agent for the Zygons, but she seems bang on with this one.

But why?

Why has the Solitract copied Your World, including Grace and Trine, and built a doorway to Our Universe?

The Damsel :

When you put it like that, it sounds like a trap.


The Elder :
What you mean, no?


Our Lady :
This World is falling apart because of us still being Here.
You and us are still totally incompatible.
Erik being here may have been manageable, but FIVE of us?

That's a lot more incompatible stuff!
You've gone over capacity.
You need to let us go now.

The Damsel :
More of those mineral samples.

FIVE in total. I remember.

The Damsel :
The objects, why are they shaking?


I remember.

Our Lady :

Yaz, what's happening? Oh. Why are they doing that?

I remember what they did. 
FIVE objects. FIVE planets. 
 One weapon. They stole FIVE planets.

Our Lady :
That's not possible.

Thursday, 4 January 2018

You Have to Have Five.

" We say Our Prayers. 
Then we write Our News. 
We read in the book corner. 
We measure and We weigh. 
We buy things at the shop. 
We have Our milk. 
We play in the playing ground. 
We dance and... "
[breaks down crying with pure joy]

[Tommy's cupboard]

(Tommy is still reading aloud.

"Intelligence as a concept :
 The simplistic notion that the intelligence quotient ...

(He looks the new word up in a dictionary.) 

" Quotient : Result given by dividing one quantity by another. "

It's no use. 

I don't understand the words. 

I'll have to ask someone what's happened to me. 

Yates - He's my friend, I think. 
I'll ask Mister Yates..!

(Tommy opens the door.

Moss may be in the garden, if he hasn't run away altogether, of course. 

But we'll meet in the cellar. 

Yes, I suppose so. The sooner we get on with it, the better. 
I haven't had a moment's peace since Lupton disappeared. 

Ten minutes. 

If I can find them, of course.

(Tommy thinks over what he has heard.)

I haven't had a moment's peace since Lupton disappeared. 

But we'll meet in the cellar. 
We'll meet in the cellar. 
In the cellar. 
In the cellar. 
In the cellar. 
In the cellar. 
In the cellar. 


Lupton has gone down to the cellar. 
Lupton has gone down to the cellar. 
Lupton has gone down to the cellar. 
Lupton has gone down. 

Lupton. Clever Lupton! 

(Tommy remembers Lupton appearing out of thin air.) 


Clever Lupton....

(Tommy gets the crystal from his shoe box.

Cho-Je. I'll ask Cho-Je. 

(He hides the crystal in an empty first aid box.)

(Mike is sitting up and trying to free his hands when Barnes enters. Mike says something through the gag so Barnes removes it.


What are you going to do? 


About Lupton. I told you, I overheard you talking. 

There's nothing we can do. Just got to wait for him and keep you here until he comes back. 

But as you said yourselves, he may not be able to. 

I know. As I said, there's nothing we can do. 

Of course there is. Re-establish the link, the contact. 

You mean with the mandala and the ceremony? 

He's probably waiting for you to do just that. 

There are only four of us. You have to have five. 

I'll help. 

You? Why should you help? 

Because of Sarah Jane Smith, of course. 

I want her back just as much as you want Lupton. 

Yes, yes, of course. 
But how do I know it's not just some sort of trick? 

Oh, for Pete's sake. Of course it isn't! Come on, untie me.

His Compassion protected him, just as Tommy's Innocence was his shield. 

Wednesday, 24 October 2012

"...And then, I'd be grateful if you could just show me your bawls, Mr So-Called-President...."

Isn't publically offering a $5million dollar personal check to a sitting President with the aim of soliciting special favours or services in kind a serious federal offence..?

Sure, it might be made out to "a charity of your choice", but that's just the same as offering a cop who pulls you over to make a spontaneous donation to the Fraternal Order of Police Benevolent Fund or private fundraising for Central American Contra Death Squads in order to pay for them to have food and adequate medical supplies in the field. And not bazookas.

Didn't he claim to be "totally satisfied" the last time once he saw the long form birth certificate?

What's he going to demand next time? Paternity test? Cheek swab? Skin sample? The Suddentenland?

The real painful truth about Donald Trump is this: he is, in actuality, a TERRIBLE businessman.

And unbelievably, just by sheer virtue of the fact no-one's ever sumouned the will or the patience to tell it to him straight, he actually believes he's a one-man corporate genius, demigod of a tycoon and that his hair and his face look either natural or good. And not like Snooki's delinquent absentee father/deadbeat Dad.

He doesn't have the intellectual or financial prowess to calculate a tip properly.

Check out some of these failed business schemes that have bankrupted other people (never him) about four or five times now... They're just awful, ideas TERRIBLE business pitches with absoulutely no market and no future:-

Of particular note:

"In the early 90s, Trump found himself the owner of a 
personal debt of $900 million. That's not the companies he owns. At the time, his companies were in $3.5 billion of corporate debt. No, he himself owed almost a billion dollars personally after somehow convincing the world he was worth more than NASA's 30-year Voyager missions to Jupiter, Saturn, Neptune and Uranus.

You could offer to buy everyone in the United States a drink and not owe as much money as he did. He could have personally cancelled out the Seychelles' economy by moving there.


While sane men with jobs can't borrow a few grand, a man who's filed more 11's than a fantasy soccer manager was allowed to spend the lifetime income of over five hundred of them before anyone noticed he didn't actually have it. The corporate debts equal the entire education budget of two states, meaning society would actually have seen the exact same fiscal return if they'd invested the money in educating millions of children. And people still lend him money today. Enjoy that thought as you chew dry macaroni to pay off your student loans."


"In 1988 Eastern Air Lines routes were about as profitable as Indian buffalo hunting grounds, and dying out faster. Trump's cunning plan was to buy them and make them more expensive. He justified the increased fares with the sort of pointless bling typically reserved for silver-plated watermelons. The Trump Shuttles featured maple wood veneer floors, chrome seat belt latches, and gold-plated toilet fittings so that the passengers could know how it felt to value money as much as Trump does.
His idea of the Mile High Club is to screw investors up there
The purchase was financed by a $380 million loan from 22 banks and not one of them ever saw a cent. As we'll soon find out, Trump has knocked over more banks than the Joker, who at least leaves once he's taken the money. Trump tends not to be satisfied with ruining mere days.
For instance, after he defaulted on the loans the banks were forced to repossess the airline's assets, which it turns out were worth approximately as much as the Hindenburg's spare gas tank. They couldn't sell them, they couldn't use them, and they had to negotiate a settlement to force the company to even try to turn a profit. Since then it's been repeatedly re-merged with other divisions in the world's only financial application of homeopathy. They seem to be attempting to dilute it with enough other companies that Trump's presence will stop mattering quite as much."

Read more: 10 Stories About Donald Trump You Won't Believe Are True |

Oh, I can't resist it any longer....

Just one last time, for old time's sake...