Wikipedia

Newsroom 2x08 Wikipedia Clip

Hey, MacKenzie, I didn't realize that 

you were president of the Oxford Union.

You had to have been one of the first women presidents, right?

Cambridge. 

I'm sorry?

I was President of The Cambridge Union.

Oh. Uh-oh. Sorry. 

That was Wikipedia.

Wikipedia says I went to Oxford?

I think I'm remembering right. 

Will McAvoy :

Mac. You're pitching A Perfect Game. 

Let this one go.

You don't think I can let it go?

Will McAvoy :

I wasn't challenging you.

Oh, I'll let it go.

Either way, it's a big honour.

Yes, though not either way. 

Just one way.

Right.

Okay.

- Can I see you when you're done? - Sure.

- Gary signed your book. - Here's the thing.

You wanted me?

I just wanted to check in on the site.

We're doing fine. 

Everybody's doing fine.

Except Sloan who's flipping out 

because somebody bought her book

at the Sandy auction on Sunday 

and it wasn't really signed by her.

It's funny the things people try to control

when they feel like they're not in control.

I wasn't really listening.

I need you to change my Wikipedia page.

Sure.

I checked and for some reason, it says 

I was President of the Oxford Union.

Weren't you? 

No. I went to Cambridge. 

Right. I knew that.

Do you know who else went to Cambridge?

John Milton, Charles Darwin,

Jane Goodall, Alan Turing,

E.M. Forster, Stephen Hawking,

The King of Jordan, Prime Minister of India,

and three signatories to the Declaration of Independence.

Will McAvoy :

Mac, I wonder if you can switch me off.

You're screaming names of smart people in my ear.

Sorry. 

Will McAvoy :

They teach you that at Oxford?

So you'll get that fixed? 

Yeah.

 Mac. In here.

Did you change it?

I did.

Thank you. 

And They changed it back.

What do you mean they changed it back?

The original creator, the page administrator,

reviewed and denied the changes.

Why?

Because... Because... 

Why? Why did they do that?

Well, I e-mailed him and explained who I was, 

that you were my boss and that you have 

an expert understanding of where you did 

and didn't go to school,

and I got a very quick reply. 

Saying?

"It's Wikipedia's policy not to use information

that comes directly from the source of the article."

Say that again? 

"It's Wikipedia's...

Can't anyone edit a page? 

Yes. Except you.

So they won't allow firsthand information? 

No.

Seems sort of counterintuitive, doesn't it?

I know how you feel. 

I don't think you do.

Because no one's out there saying you were 

President of The Oxford Union

when you were 

President of The Cambridge Union,

The Greatest Debating Society 

in the history of The fucking Kingdom.

And that Kingdom's been around a long time. 

Don't I know it.

I don't even know if that was a sarcastic

geopolitical reference to colonialism or not.

It wasn't.

Good.

Good, 'cause, Neal, this is it.

We're gonna get this right. 

And I'll tell you why.

Because.

Mac, I get it.

And I'm gonna get it fixed.

Thank you. Ruling India was wrong.

It's a little late... 

I know.

AMATUERISM

When you're on Junk, you have only one worry: Scoring. 

And when you're off it, you're suddenly obliged to worry about all sorts of other shite. 

Got no money, can't get drunk. 

Got money, drinkin' too much. 

Can't get a girl, no chance of a ride. 

Got a girl, too much hassle. 

You have to worry about bills, about food about some football team that never fucking wins. 

About human relationships and all the things that really don't matter, when you've got a Sincere and Truthful junk habit. 

 

The only drawback, or at least the principal drawback, is that you have to endure all manner of cunts telling you that -- 

“No way would I poison my body with that shite. All them fucking chemicals. No fucking way. [ Inhales cigarette ] 

“It's a waste of your life, man... poisoning your body with that shite.”

“Every chance you've had, son, you've blown it. Stuffing your veins with that filth.”

From time to time, even I have uttered the magic words :

“Never again, Swanney. I'm off the skag."

MOTHER SUPERIOR :

Are you serious? 

MARK RENTON :

Yeah, No More. 

I'm finished with that shite.

MOTHER SUPERIOR :

Well, that's up to you, man. 

MARK RENTON :

Gonna do it right this time. 

Gonna get it sorted out, get off it for good. 

MOTHER SUPERIOR :

I'm sure I've heard that one before. 

MARK RENTON :

The Sick Boy method. 

MOTHER SUPERIOR :

Oh, well, it really worked for him, eh? 

MARK RENTON :

Well, he's always been lacking a certain moral fibre. 

MOTHER SUPERIOR :

He knows a lot about Sean Connery.

MARK RENTON :

That's hardly a substitute.

MOTHER SUPERIOR :

You need one more hit? 

MARK RENTON :

No, I don't think so. 

MOTHER SUPERIOR :

For the long night that lies ahead? 

We called him Mother Superior on account of the length of his habit. 

Of course I'd have another shot. 

After all, I had work to do. 

 

Still got my security key.

?ҵİ?ȫȨ?޻?????

This place has gone to hell without me.

??ط?û???Ҿͱ?????????????

Mm-hmm.

?ź?

It's almost 1:00 in the morning, Jim.

???ڶ????賿һ???? Jim

Are you not coming home or answering my calls or texts?

??Ͳ?????ؼ??ˣ? Ҳ????????ҵĶ??ź͵绰??

I told you my editor wanted me to write more personally.

?Ҹ??߹??? ?ҵı༭ ????д?ĸ?˽?˻?һ??

There are classified documents in this room.

?????????л????ļ?

You can't be in here.

?㲻?????????????

It was an invasion of privacy. I'm really sorry for that.

???Ƕ?????˽???ַ? ?Һܱ?Ǹ

I was mad. We had just had the last fight

??????????? ?????ճ????

and I went into the other room and wrote it.

??????һ?????? ?ҾͰ?????д??????

You know my computer doesn't trust me.

??֪???ҵĵ???һֱ????????

It always asks are you sure you want to do this?

???????????Dz???ȷ?? ??????????????ѡ??

But it never asks before I hit...

?????Ұ?????ǰȴ????????...

I don't care about the invasion of privacy. I wish I did.

?Ҷ??ַ???˽???????????? ?һ?ϣ????????????

I've been here for hours

????????˺ü???Сʱ

trying to make myself mad because it was an invasion of privacy.

??????Ϊ?????Լ? ??Ϊ???ַ?????˽??????

And the crowd would be on my side. That's a no-brainer.

?붼?????? ???ڿ϶???վ???????

- You don't like me very much. - And I wish I didn't like you so much.

- ????Dz?ϲ???? - ??Ҳϣ????˰?

Took five fucking days, Hallie,

?Ŷ̶??????ʱ?? Hallie

for you to give yourself your own reality show.

??͸??Լ??ҵ??˸??????????̨

I understand your wanting to insult me right now,

??֪????????????????

but that's not what I did.

???ҿ?û????ô??

Writing about the media, writing about the New York elite,

дд????ý??Ŀ??? дд????ŦԼ??Ӣ??????

telling personal stories that resonate with readers

???Լ??Ĺ?????????߹???

doesn't take one cent away from covering Syria

??Щ?ͱ????????Ǿ??? ????????ͻ

and Afghanistan and Washington.

?????׶????????¼? ??һ??ͬΪ???ű???

There are foreign correspondents,

?????ﻹ?з????¼???

sports correspondents, fashion correspondents.

???????? ????ʱ?м?????

And an unbearable correspondent.

???и??????̵ļ???

Jealous of the New York elites? I've got you covered.

?????˼?ŦԼ??Ӣ???Ұ??????

A movie star was at an environmental fundraiser

?μӻ???????ļ????Ӱ??

and they rode on a private jet?

??Ȼ????˽?˷ɻ?ȥ?ģ?

Here's your phony outrage.

????͸???д?????ʵķ?ŭ??

Feeling a little like you didn't make the cut?

??Ϊ?Լ?û??ѡ?϶???????ƽ??

I hereby declare that amateurs are awesome

?????ھ????? ҵ??IJ????????

and professionals are so 20 years ago.

רҵ??ʿ????????

Only instead of professionals, I'm gonna say old media,

???????????? ?Ҳ?˵רҵ??ʿ ?????ý??

and instead of Jim, I'm gonna say Tim

??Ҳ??˵Jim ????Tim

because I'm Hallie Shea, Senior Fuck You Correspondent

??Ϊ????Hallie Shea ?߼??????ü???

- and I've decided to become a star. - Are you drunk?

- ?Ҿ?????Ϊһ?????ŵ????? - ???Dz??Ǻ????ˣ?

Did you out yourself about the Boston tweet to make sure no one suspected anyone else

??????Ϊ?????????˱????? ???ԲŰ??Լ?????ȥ??

or did you do it to let our enemies know you were available?

???????????ǵĵ??? ֪??????Ա???????

Do you hear the way you're talking right now?

??֪????????˵?Ķ???ʲô????

- Our enemies? - Did you?

- ???ǵĵ??ˣ? - ??˵?Dz??ǣ?

I'm gonna stay at my place tonight.

?ҽ???????????ס??

Do you mind if I tell you something?

???ܸ???˵???¶???

Your problem isn't with me and it isn't with the site.

???????ĸ?Դ?????? Ҳ?????????վ

It's with the audience. You don't like that they like what they like

?????׻??????ǹ????? ?㲻ϲ??????ƾ?Լ???ϲ??ѡ??????

because you need them to like you and that's no different...

??Ϊ??ϣ??????ֻϲ???? ???????...

I don't give a shit about me or liking me

?ҲŲ???????ϲ??ϲ????

or following me or friending me or trending.

??ز???ע?? ?Ӳ????Һ??? ?????ҵ????۳ɲ???Ϊ????

It's just ugly.

??????????ʽʵ????̫??ª??

I think you're threatened by technology.

??ֻ?????Ƚ??ĿƼ? ?????ȡ???˰?

I beam a signal into outer space every night.

??ÿ????????̫?շ????ź?

I'm not scared of your Samsung Galaxy. What else you got?

?Ҳ?û??????????ֻ??ŵ? ?㻹??˵???ɶ??

I want to be part of the digital revolution. I want to be part of...

??ϣ????Ϊ??????ָ?????һ???? ??ϣ????Ϊ...

Oh, my God! I am not talking about the apparatus.

Ŷ ?ҵ????ţ? ?Ҳ?????̸??Щ?????豸

Just tell me you know I'm right.

??͸????? ??˵???ǶԵİ?

Please. Please.

??????

At least tell me that.

???????֪?????ǶԵ?

Tell me when you knock away the digital revolution bullshit...

??????ȥ???ָ??????ֹ?ƨ????...

"We're not beholden to corporate masters."

?????DzŲ???ȥմ??ҵ??ͷ?Ĺ⡱

Yeah, or any standard of good taste.

?ɲ????? ????????Ʒζ????Ҫ??

Tell me, please, that you know all you did

?????˵˵ ????????ֻ????????

was have a fight with your boyfriend and litigate it in public.

???Լ??????ѵ???ս??????ý

Because I have spent time with hardcore drug movers

?ҿ??ǺͲ??ٶ??????????

and they don't pretend they're selling medicine.

Yeah, I'm drunk.

I'm gonna miss you.

You're gonna miss a lot of things, Jim.

 

MASTER OF TRINITY:

Life slips by, Abrahams, Life slips by.

But this fine old university she offers some rare onsolations, wouldn't you say?

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

Beyond measure, sir.

MASTER OF CAIUS:

I can take it, then, that you would be acutely grieved to discover that any behavior or action your part were causing her grief?

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

Naturally, sir, I would, deeply.

MASTER OF CAIUS:

Good. I was sure of it.

MASTER OF TRINITY:

Here in Cambridge, we've always been proud of our athletic prowess.

We believe, we've always believed, that our games are indispensable in helping to complete the education of an Englishman.

They create character they foster courage, honesty and leadership.

But most of all an unassailable spirit of loyalty, comradeship, and mutual responsibility.

Would you agree?

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

Yes, sir. I would.

[BELL TOLLING]

MASTER OF TRINITY:

Abrahams, there is a growing suspicion in the bosom of this university and I tell you this without in any way decrying your achievements in which we all rejoice that in your enthusiasm for success you have perhaps lost sight of some of these ideals.

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

May I ask what form this disloyalty, this betrayal, takes?

MASTER OF CAIUS:

Oh, hardly betrayal.

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

The word "grief" was mentioned.

MASTER OF CAIUS:

It's said that you use a personal coach.

 

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

Mr. Mussabini, yes.

MASTER OF CAIUS:

Is he an Italian?

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

Of Italian extraction, yes.

 

MASTER OF CAIUS:

I see.

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :
But not all Italian.

MASTER OF CAIUS:

I'm relieved to hear it.

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

He's half Arab.

MASTER OF TRINITY:

Do we take it that you employ this Mr. Masambini on a Professional basis?

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

Sam Mussabini is the finest, most advanced clearest-thinking athletics coach in the country.

I'm honored he considers me worthy of his complete attention.

MASTER OF TRINITY:

Nevertheless, he is a Professional.

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

What else would he be? 

He's The Best.

MASTER OF TRINITY:

Oh, but there, Mr. Abrahams, I'm afraid our paths diverge.

You see, this university believes that The Way of The Amateur is the only one to provide satisfactory results.

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :
I am an Amateur.

You've been trained by a Professional.

You've adopted a Professional Attitude.

For the past year, you've concentrated wholly on developing your own technique in the headlong pursuit, may I suggest, of individual glory.

 

Not a policy very conducive to the fostering of esprit de corps.

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

I am a Cambridge man first and last.

I am an Englishman first and last.

What I have achieved, what I intend to achieve, is for my family my university, and my country.

And I bitterly resent your suggesting otherwise.

MASTER OF TRINITY:

Your aim is to win at all costs, is it not?

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

At all costs, no.

But I do aim to win within the rules.

Perhaps you would rather I play the gentleman and lost?

MASTER OF CAIUS:

To playing the tradesman, yes.

MASTER OF TRINITY:

My dear boy, your approach has been, if I may say so, a little too plebeian.

You are The Elite.
 And are therefore expected to behave as such.

HAROLD ABRAHAMS :

Thank you, sir... for your hospitality.

The evening has been most illuminating.

Good night to you, sir.

You know, gentlemen... you yearn for victory just as I do.

But achieved with the apparent effortlessness of gods.

Yours are the archaic values of the prep-school playground.

You deceive no one but yourselves.

I believe in the pursuit of excellence... and I'll carry The Future with me.

[DOOR OPENS]

[DOOR CLOSES]

MASTER OF TRINITY:

Well, there goes your Semite, Hugh.

 

MASTER OF CAIUS:

A different God - a different mountaintop.

 

 

 

Take the best orgasm you've ever had... multiply it by a thousand, and you're still nowhere near it. 

 

[ Sighs ] 

 

That beats ANY meat injection, man — That beats ••any•• fucking cock in The World.