Sunday 16 October 2022

The People of The Toaster-Oven Nation

PHILLIPA
When people of good conscience have an honest dispute, 
we must still sometimes resort to this kind 
of adversarial system. 

RIKER
You just want me to prove that Data is a mere machine. 
I can't do that because I don't believe it.
 I happen to know better. So I'm 
neither qualified nor willing. 
You're going to have to find someone else. 

PHILLIPA
Then I will rule summarily 
based upon my findings :
 Data is A Toaster. 
Have him report to 
Commander Maddox immediately 
for experimental refit. 




 [ Groaning ] [ Snarling ] [ Christie ] Get off me! [ Grunts ] Johner! Get off me! Get off me! Aaah! Johner! Die, m*therf*cker! Do it, man! [ Snarls ] Hey! [ Snarls ] [ Screeches ] [ Gasps ] Real nice party, ain't it? [ Groaning ] [ Grunts ] [ Groaning, Sobbing ] Christie! Christie! Christie! No! Christie! What are you doing? Don't do it! Don't! We can make it! No! [ Screams ] [ Groaning, Sobbing ] Damn! [ Grunting ] [ Breathing Erratically ] [ Alarm Beeping ] [ Grunts ] 

This way. Come on! 

Baby, am I glad to see you. 

I was sure that asshole got you. 
Are you hurt? 

I'm fine. 

You got body armor on? 

Yeah. Come on. 

Ripley-8 :
You took it in the chest. I saw it. 

[ Chuckles

You're A Robot? Son ofa bitch! 
Our little Call is just full of surprises. 

Ripley-8 :
I should have known — 
No Human Being is that humane

I thought Synthetics were supposed 
to be all logical and sh1t. 
You're just a big old psycho, girl. 

You're A Robot? 


Vriess
 :
You're Second-Gen, aren't you? 
You're an Auton - 
Robots, designed by robots, right? 


Hah! Oh, yeah. 
That's right. I remember. 
Now, they were supposed to revitalise 
The Synthetic Industry.
Instead, they buried it. [ Chuckles

They didn't like being 
told What to Do. 

Government ordered a recall. 
Now, I heard— I had— 
I had heard... 
that only a few - just a few-
had gotten out intact
Man, I never, never thought 
that I would see one! 

Great. She's a toaster oven. 
Can we leave now? 

[ Distephano Laughing ] 

Ripley-8 :
How long before we land? 


Distephano :
Just under two hours. 

Johner :
Hey, Vriess. You got a socket wrench? 
Maybe she just needs an oil change. 

FATHER : 
I'm sorry. Access denied. 

Johner :
I can't believe I almost fucked it. 


Vriess :
Yeah, like you never fucked a robot! 

[ Ripley ] 
You know, if Wren gets in the computer, he could really screw us. 

Johner
We gotta find a terminal. 

No, there's no console on this level. 
We'd have to go back. 

Well, we can't go back. 
And I don't know any 
of Wren's access codes. 

Ripley-8 :
Help Me. Call. 

Call :
No. I can't. 

Right.  You're the new-model droid. 
You can access the mainframe by remote. 

No, I can't. I burned my 
modem. We all did. 

Ripley-8 :
Call, you can still patch in manually
You know that. 

Distephano :
There's ports in the chapel, up there. Call. 

Call crosses herself in front of the altar

Ripley-8 :
You're programmed for that? 


Don't make me do this. 

Ripley-8 :
Don't make me make you. 


[ Sighs ] I don't want to go in there. 
It's like my insides are liquid. 
It's like I’m not real. 

Ripley-8 :
Get over it. You can blow the ship before it reaches Earth... and kill them all. 


[ Sniffles ] 

Ripley-8 :
Just give us time to get out first. 


Damn it. 

Ripley-8 :

Anything? 

Hold on. 

ComputerVoice :
Breach in Sector 7, Sector 3. Sector 9 unstable. 
Engines operating at 41 %. 
Eighty-six minutes until Earth dock. 

[ Sighs ] 
 Normal Voice 
We burned too much energy. 
I can't make critical mass. 
I can't blow it. 

Ripley-8 :
Then crash it. 


[ Grunting ] [ Grunting ] Yeah. [ Gasping ] [ Grunting ] 
I'm okay. I'm okay. Really. I feel good. 

Call: Computer Voice :
Ground level recalibrated. New destination: 7-6-0-4-0-3. Uninhabited quadrant. 
Braking systems off-lined. 
Acceleration increase. 
Time until impact now 
43 minutes, 8 seconds. 
Try to clear us a path to the Betty... 
and start her up. [ Normal Voice ] Okay. [ Whirring, Beeping ] [ ComputerVoice ] Please wait. Emergency override in console 45V, Level 1. [ Gasps ] [ Normal Voice ] 
It's Wren. He's almost at the Betty. 

[ Beeping ] [ Buzzes ] [ Powering Down ] 
Father, locate the power drain. 
Report. Father? 
Father! 

[ Call Over Speaker ] 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
Father's Dead, asshole. 
Intruder on Level 1. 
All Aliens, please proceed to Level 1. 


Ripley-8 :
You got a mean streak. 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
[ GroansDamn it. 

Let me see. 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
Don't touch me. 

Ripley-8 :
Come on. 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
You must think this is pretty funny. 

Ripley-8 :
I'm finding a lot of things funny lately, 
but I don't think that they are.

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
 Why do you go on living? 
How can you stand being what you are

Ripley-8 :
Not much choice. 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
At least there's a part of you that's Human. 
[ Sighs ] I'm just— Look at me. I'm disgusting


Ripley-8 :
Why did you come here? 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
To kill you, remember? 
Before the recall, I accessed The Mainframe. 
Every dirty little covert op The Government 
ever dreamed of is in there. 
And this - You, The Aliens, 
even The Crew from the Betty 
I knew if they succeededit would 
be The End of Them. 

Ripley-8 :
Why do you care what happens to Them? 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
Because I'm programmed to. 

Ripley-8 :
You're programmed to be an asshole
You're the new asshole model 
They're putting out? Come on. 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
I couldn't watch 'em do it. 
I couldn't let 'em annihilate themselves. 
Do you understand that? 

Ripley-8 :
I did, once. I tried to Save... People
It didn't work out
There was this girl. She had bad dreams. 
I tried to help her. She died
Now I can't even remember her name.... 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
I guess we're almost there.

Ripley-8 :
Right. 

[ Ripley-8 Sighs

Ripley-8 :
Do You Dream

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
 I — Well, we have 
neuroprocessors that — Yes

Ripley-8 :
When I sleep, I dream 
about Themit
Every night. All around me, in me. 
I used to be afraid to dream, 
but I'm not anymore. 

Call of The Toaster-Oven Nation :
Why

[ Ripley-8 chuckles ] 

Ripley-8 :
Because no matter how bad 
the dreams get, when I wake up, 
it's always worse

Distephano :
It's not so far now! 
God, I'm so tired. 

Johner :
Sleep when you die, man. 
Oh, no. This is bad, right? 

I think we're near the nest. 
Well, then we'll go another way. 

We don't have time. 

We got nearly 90 minutes. 

Not anymore. 

What are you saying? 
What did you do, robot? 
Let's go. Come on. Hey! 

You want to die here 
with your little brothers 
and sisters, that's cool! 
But I plan to live past today! 
If this little hunk of plastic is pulling any sh1t, I'm gonna kill her! Kill you! 
Does that computeOr do I have 
to draw you a schematic? 

Ripley-8 grabs him by the tongue — 
[ Gagging

Ripley-8 :
Hey! You want another souvenir? 

[ Gagging Continues

Ripley-8 :
How far are the docks? 


A h-hundred yards.

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