Evil Robot Hand

Nathan: 

These Reevaluations are always a bit of a mixed blessing. 

Sad as we lose one of our own. 

But also hopeful as we turn towards The Future and - 

promote one of our own.

Lilah. You have made a lot of great contributions 

and I know you have tried your very, very best...

Lilah: 

No!

She scrabbles for her purse, 

but Lindsey puts his hands over hers. 

Lindsey: 

Lilah. Please. 

(Lilah stops and looks at him)

They chose me.  I'm clearly The Guy.

Nathan Reed: 

Yes, you are.

Lindsey to Lilah: 

You could've had it. 

But you didn't have what it takes.

Lindsey raises his right hand up and Lilah jumps, letting out a little scream as he wriggles his fingers. 

Lindsey almost laughing: 

An Evil Robot Hand.

I mean, come on, who here does, huh? 

(Gets up and motions towards a guy across from him at the table) 

Leon doesn't. 

Charlie doesn't.

 

(Ruffles the hair of the guy sitting on Lilah's other side, and looks at Nathan) 

You do know you gave me An Evil Robot Hand, right? 

(Nathan doesn't move) 

I've been writing 'Kill, kill, kill' on everything. 

It's crazy. It's crazy. 

ANYTHING could happen!

Nathan to the guard

Allen. 

Lindsey: 

Allen, how are you?

Allen reaches for his gun, but Lindsey slugs him, sending his ear-piece dangling down his neck, and grabs the gun Allan is reaching for and presses it into the guards chest. 

Allen raises his hands. 

Lindsey: 

Uh-oh.

Shoots the guard in the foot while looking at Nathan. 

Lindsey: 

Uh, that's gonna hurt in the morning!

Allen is hopping around on one foot and Lindsey pushes him to the floor before waving the gun at the people sitting around the table. 

Lindsey: 

Stop, Evil Hand, stop it.

Fires of a few shots in Nathan's direction shattering some pottery behind him and making Nathan flinch a bit. 

Lindsey grinning: 

I just can't control my evil hand. 

(Walks up to Nathan's end of the table) 

Nathan, I'm so proud that you chose me. 

(Ruffles Charlie's hair as he walks past him) 

Charlie! 

If I would have been in your shoes - 

I would have chosen Lilah. 

(Lilah turns to stare at Lindsey) 

Let me tell you why. 

Do you have any idea of the hours this chick has logged in? Huh? 

The files she has on you guys? Deep stuff. 

Ronnie, your stock manipulations, 

Nathan's little offshore accounts... 

Can you imagine if something were to happen to this girl and those files got back to The Senior Partners?

They'd eat you alive! 

(Lilah looks at him with a frown) 

She's been working overtime, boys. 

She's everything you ever dreamed off. 

Lilah is Your Guy. Me - 

(leans down on the table next to Nathan, who looks straight ahead) 

I'm unreliable. I've got these evil hand issues - 

and I'm bored with this crap. 

And besides, I'm leaving, so - 

if you wanna chase me, be my guest, 

and remember (holds up his hand) Evil. 

(Knocks on the table with his right hand.) 

Charlie.

Lindsey quietly to Lilah as he passes her: 

Good luck.

Lilah jumps, putting a hand over her mouth then turns to stare at Lindsey as he walks towards the door. 

He gives her a big grin, and waves his right hand in the air. 

Lindsey: 

Evil.

Lilah stands and stares as the door closes behind Lindsey. 

Nathan: 

Well. Let's amend the minutes. 

Lilah Morgan was promoted.  

And, uh, someone call an ambulance.