Ain’t We Just.

Jayne is polishing the coins they took off the Grange brothers. Zoe enters.

 

ZOE

Badger just hailed us.

Gettin' impatient for his share. 

Wants us to drop it to his men on the Kowlan Fed Base.

 

JAYNE

That'd be a hell of a lot easier to do

without the two most wanted on board. 

Life would look to be simpler

us not carrying fugies.

 

ZOE

(to Mal)

He is right, you know.

 

MAL

Yeah. Simpler.

 

EXT. HILL FOLK VILLAGE - NIGHT - CONTINUOUS

The hill folk have built themselves a post and pyre right quick. 

The Patron is hauling River toward it, intent on burning her witch-ass. 

They tie her to the pole, hands behind her back.

 

SIMON

Take me instead. 

Take My Life for Hers.

 

PATRON

The Witch must die. 

God commands it.

 

The Patron nods at some hill folk with torches. 

They move to light the pyre.

 

SIMON

No! Get away from her!

 

Simon runs forward, pulls the hill folk away from River.

Simon punches both hill folk out.

 

SIMON

She has done nothing to you!

If she dies tonight, it won't be God's will

that killed her, it'll be you!

Your lunacy!

Your ignorance!

 

Seeing he's made no impact on the unchanging sea of faces,

Simon moves back and steps on the platform holding River.

 

STARK

That's not going to stop us, doctor.

 

RIVER

(to Simon)

Post-holer :

Digging holes for posts.

 

Tender moment with Simon gazing up at River's smiling face.

He rises one last step and wraps his arms around River.

 

SIMON

Light it.

 

RIVER.

Time to go.

 

Hold on them for a moment.

Then we hear a RUSHING sound of engines overhead.

SERENITY appears over the clearing where the trial is taking place.

 

The CARGO BAY DOORS open to reveal JAYNE in a harness.

JAYNE cocks VERA and draws a bead on the hill folk.

 

MAL and ZOE enter from the back of the crowd, guns drawn.

They speak loudly to be heard over the engine noise.

 

MAL

Well, look at this!

Appears we got here  just in the nick of time.

 

What does  that make us?

 

ZOE

Big Damn Heroes, sir.

 

MAL

AIN'T - WE - JUST.

 

Sorry to interrupt, folks.

 

Y'all got something that belongs to us 

and we'd like it back.

 

PATRON

This is a holy cleansing.

You cannot  think to thwart God's will.

 

MAL

Y'all see the man hanging out of the spaceship

with the really big gun?

 

Now I'm not saying you weren't easy to find.

 

It was kinda out of our way,

and he didn't want to come in the first place.

 

Man's lookin' to kill some folk.

So really it's his will y'all  should worry about thwarting.

 

(to Simon)

Gotta say, doctor, your talent for alienatin'

folk is near miraculous.

 

SIMON

….yes, I'm very proud.

 

MAL

Cut her down.

 

PATRON

That girl is a witch.

 

MAL

Yeah, but she's our witch.

(cocks gun)

So cut her the hell down.

 

BLACK OUT.

 

INT. SERENITY - SIMON'S ROOM

Close shot of Simon's bed. Someone's dumping a bagful of loot onto it.

It's Jayne, hastily returning his ill-gotten gains.

Jayne darts out of Simon's room into,

INT. SERENITY - CORRIDOR - CONTINUOUS

Jayne's beating his retreat when he sees Simon walking past.

 

JAYNE

(looking guilty)

Hey, there, doctor.

Glad you're back now on The Ship.

 

SIMON

Thanks.

 

Simon keeps walking. Jayne bolts up the stairs.

INT. SERENITY - COMMON AREA - CONTINUOUS

Mal is standing outside the infirmary. Simon enters.

 

SIMON

I've moved him to his room.

 

MAL

How's he faring?

 

SIMON

He's gonna be fine. Yeah.

They took  good care of him.

 

MAL

Good to know.

 

SIMON

So finally a decent wound on This Ship,

and I miss out. I'm sorry.

 

MAL

Well, you were busy trying to get yourself

lit on fire. It happens.

 

SIMON

Captain... why did you come back for us?

 

MAL

You're on My Crew.

 

SIMON

Yeah, but you don't even like me.

(beat)

Why'd you come back?

 

MAL

You're on My Crew.

Why we still talking about this?

(walks off, over his shoulder)

Chow's in ten. No need to dress.

 

I Can Not Abide Useless People.

GRAND BALLROOM - PROBABLY NIGHT

KAYLEE 

(watching the dancing, to a young gentleman

standing on the edge of the dance floor)

Aren't they something. They're like butterflies,

or little pieces of wrapping paper blowing around.

The young gentleman bows and walks off, leaving Kaylee. She looks a little sad, bur rallies and walks over to a group of women.

KAYLEE

Hello.

BANNING

I don't.. um... have we been introduced?

KAYLEE 

(shaking hands with first woman)

Oh, I'm Kaylee.

BANNING

Banning. And this is Destra, Cabott and Zelle.

KAYLEE

(gushing)

Don't you just love this party? Everything's so

fancy, and there's some kind of hot cheese over there.

CABOTT

It's not as good as last year.

KAYLEE

Oh really? What'd they have last year?

CABOTT

Standards.

Kaylee looks crestfallen.

BANNING

Who made your dress, Kaylee?

KAYLEE

Oh, do you like it? When I saw the ruffles, 

I just couldn't resist.

BANNING

You ought to see to your girl.

KAYLEE

[Shah muh? - "What?"]

BANNING

Your girl. She's not very good. She made you a

dress that looks like you bought it in a store.

KAYLEE

Oh, I didn't know.

An older gentleman has obviously overheard this exchange, and walks to Kaylee's side.

MURPHY

Why Banning Miller. What a vision you are in your

fine dress. It must have taken a dozen slaves a 

dozen days to get you into that getup.

(Banning preens)

'Course your daddy tells me it takes the space of

a schoolboy's wink to get you out of it again.

Banning gets huffy and stalks off, followed by the other women. Kaylee looks surprised and delighted.

MURPHY

Forgive my rudeness. I cannot abide useless people.

Mal and Inara dancing, while Atherton looks on with a glare. Mal missteps the dance, and Inara and Mal both chuckle.

MAL

It's possible you were right, and this ain't my

kind of party.

They are comfortable with each other, laughing and smiling. Atherton barges in and roughly grabs Inara's arm and pulls her away from the dance floor.

MAL

Whoa now. Watch yourself. Ain't no need for hands on.

ATHERTON

Excuse me, she's not here with you, Captain. She's mine.

MAL

Yours? She don't belong to nobody.

ATHERTON

Money changed hands, which makes her mine tonight.

And no matter how you dress her up she's still...

Mal hauls off and slugs him before he can get the rest of the sentence out.

MAL 

(to Inara)

Turns out this is my kind of party.

INARA

Oh, Mal.

MAL

What? Man was out of line.

ATHERTON

(recovering, angry)

I accept.

MAL

That's great. What?

GENTLEMAN

There has been a challenge.

ATHERTON

I hope you're prepared, Captain.

MAL

What? You all talking about a fight? That's fine.

(taking off his jacket)

Let's get out of here.

INARA

It's not a fist fight, Mal.

GENTLEMAN

The duel will be met tomorrow morning at Cadrie Pond.

MAL

Well, why wait? Where's that guard? He collected

a whole mess of pistols.

GENTLEMAN

If you require it, any gentleman here can give you

use of a sword.

MAL

Use of a swo... what?

END OF ACT TWO

ACT THREE

INT. GRAND BALLROOM - NIGHT

Back where we left off, Mal in hot water:

KAYLEE

What's going on?

MAL

I'm not rightly sure. What's going on?

HARROW

First off, you'll be put up in lodgings for the night,

so you don't disappear. I wouldn't blame you,

incidentally. Wing may be a spoiled dandy, but he's

an expert swordsman. He's killed a dozen men with a

longblade. You're the only one gave him a reason.

MAL

(exasperated)

Oh this is a joke.

INARA

He'll need a second.

MAL

What's that?

HARROW

I'll take on the job.

INARA

He fights if you refuse.

ATHERTON

(moving towards the entranceway)

Inara, come with me, please.

MAL 

(to Harrow)

You taking on this job... being my second...

does this mean we're in business?

HARROW

It means you're in mortal danger. But you mussed

up Atherton's face, and that has endeared you to me

somewhat. You might even give him a fight, before

he guts you.

ATHERTON 

(sharply)

Inara! 

(holds out his arm to Inara)

KAYLEE

Up until the punching, it was a real nice party.

You Call Him a Survivor — He’s Not.

The ensemble cast portrays the nine characters who live on Serenity. 

Whedon pitched the show as :

“nine people looking into 

the blackness of space 

and seeing 

nine different things.”

Mal's been telling his story. 

Harken's not buying it.

HARKEN

Reavers?

MAL

That is what I said.

HARKEN

You can't imagine how many times men in my position hear that excuse. 

"Reavers did it."

MAL

It's The Truth.

HARKEN

You saw them, did you?

MAL

Wouldn't be sitting here talking to you if I had.

HARKEN 

No, of course not.

MAL

But I'll tell you who did. 

That poor bastard you took off my ship. 

He looked right into the face of it. 

Was made to stare.

HARKEN

"It"?

MAL

The Darkness. 

Kind of Darkness you can't 

even imagine. 

Blacker than the space it 

moves through.

HARKEN

Very poetic.

MAL

They made him watch. 

He probably tried to turn away, 

and they wouldn't let him. 

You call him A Survivor? 

He's not. 

A Man comes up against 

that kind of will, 

the only way to deal with it, 

I suspect — is to become it.

He's following the only course 

left to him. 

First, he'll try to make himself look like one. 

Cut on himself, desecrate his flesh and then, 

He'll start acting like one.

A Man can Get a Job, He Might not Look too Close at What That Job is.

In folklore, three parts often represent 

The Past, The Present, 

and 

The Future.

However, it also used to be interpreted as a Cycle of Life: 

Life, Death, 

and Rebirth. 

PARADISO - NIGHT

MAL and ZOE are driving the cargo back.

MAL

We'll have to drag 'em from here. Leave 'em just off

the street. We'll notify the Sheriff when we're in 

deep, deep space.

SHERIFF

Why not tell him in person?

CUT TO:

SHERIFF and his men coming up from over a slight rise. MAL looks shocked, ZOE looks resigned.

SHERIFF (cont'd)

Got word of a ship not far out, came lookin'. Didn't

expect to find you comin' back.

It's clear now that the SHERIFF and his men are armed and prepared to use those arms if need be.

MAL

Didn't expect to be comin'.

The Sheriff's crew inspects the cargo.

DEPUTY

Nothin' missing.

SHERIFF looks at MAL, smiles, and looks down in disbelief.

SHERIFF

You were truthful back in town. These are tough

times. If a man can get a job, he might not look

too close at what that job is. But a man learns

all the details of a situation like ours, well,

then he has a choice.

MAL 

(looking stone-cold serious)

I don't believe he does.

A look of understanding passes between them.

SHERIFF 

(to crew)

Get these crates back to town. Make yourselves useful.

EXT. SERENITY - NIGHT

CROW is on his knees, hands tied behind his back

MAL

Now this is all the money Niska gave us in advance.

You bring it back to him, tell him the job didn't

work out.

(Crow spits) 

We're not thieves--but we are thieves. Point is 

we're not takin' what's his. Now we'll stay out of 

his way the best we can from here on in. You 

explain that that's best for everyone, okay?

CROW stands.

CROW

Keep the money. Use it to buy a funeral. It doesn't 

matter where you go, or how far you fly. I will 

hunt you down, and the last thing you see will 

be my blade.

MAL

Darn.

MAL kicks CROW into the engine intakes. Horrible crunching sounds happen. A second one of Niska's henchmen is brought bound before him.

MAL

Now this is all the money Niska gave us in advance.

HENCHMAN

Oh, I'm good. I speak for everyone. I'm right 

there with you.

The Battle of Serenity Valley

Captain Malcolm Reynolds :

We're close to gone out here. 

We get a job, we got to make good. 

Pvt. Zoe Washburn :

Sir, I don't disagree 

on any particular point. 

It's just... 

In The Time of War, 

we would've never left 

A Man stranded. 

Captain Malcolm Reynolds :

Maybe that's why we lost. 

“ Production came to an end 

on Buffy, Season 3 [1999], 

and over my Summer vacation,

I was reading 

The Killer Angels, 

about 

The Survivors of Gettysburg, 

and it immediately made me think 

of The Millennium Falcon.

You know, 

as most things do.”

— Joss Whedon

EXT. SERENITY VALLEY - NIGHT

We come into the middle of a battle. 

Soldiers are yelling and running, gunfire everywhere, 

stuff blowing up but good.

Camera focuses on a soldier in the silhouette 

of an explosion, running and dodging fire. 

He hits the dirt for cover. 

We PUSH IN and see that it's Mal. 

His face is dirty and he's breathing hard.

Mal's up again and running 

to rejoin his company in a makeshift foxhole.

RADIO OPERATOR

Sergeant, Command says air support is holding 

till they can assess our status.

MAL

Our Status is that we need some gorram air support.

Now get back on line and tell 'em to get in here.

ZOE

That skiff is shredding us, sir.

RADIO OPERATOR

They won't move without 

A Lieutenant's authorization code, sir.

Angry, Mal walks over and rips off the badge 

from a dead Lieutenant's uniform 

and gives it to the Radio Operator.

MAL

Here, here's Your Code -- 

You're Lieutenant Baker.

Congratulations on your promotion. 

Now get me some air support!

(to Zoe)

Pull back, just enough to wedge 'em in here. 

Get your squad to High Ground, start picking 'em off.

ZOE

High ground is Death  with that skiff in the air.

MAL

That's Our Problem. 

Thanks for volunteering.

(to Bendis)

Bendis, give us some cover fire. 

We're going duck hunting.

The foxhole is rocked by a huge explosion. 

Mal's group of soldiers are looking 

pretty young and scared. 

Time for a morale boost:

MAL

Just focus!

(beat)

The Alliance said they were gonna 

waltz through Serenity Valley 

and we choked 'em with those words.

We've done The Impossible 

and that makes us mighty.

Just a little while longer, 

Our Angels are gonna be  soaring overhead 

raining fire on those arrogant cod,

so you hold!

(yelling)

You hold! Go!

His soldiers take up their positions 

to lay down cover fire while Mal and Zoe 

prepare to take down the skiff.

ZOE

Really think we can bring her down, sir?

MAL

Do you even need to ask?

Mal pulls a necklace out from under his shirt 

and kisses the cross.

MAL

Ready?

ZOE

Always.

Mal takes off. 

Zoe prepares to follow, 

sees that no one's covering Mal.

ZOE

Bendis? Bendis!

She sees Bendis huddled across 

from her, scared stiff.

ZOE (cont'd)

(angrily)

Rut it.

Zoe grunts and stands up, laying cover fire for Mal as he moves down the hill. 

After a moment, she follows Mal down The Hill, 

taking cover with him behind some boulders. 

Mal fires into the bushes, 

causing the soldier guarding a bigass gun 

to move out of his cover and return fire. 

Mal shoots him dead.

Mal activates the bigass gun's targeting system 

while Zoe covers him. 

Mal locks a target on the skiff that's been 

killing them in the battle and fires. 

He makes a direct hit and stands back 

from the bigass gun.

MAL

Yeah!

(manly grunt)

Then Mal realizes that the skiff is outta control... 

and headed right for him. Oh, shit. Mal starts running.

MAL

Zoe!

Mal and Zoe run as the skiff hits the ground and plows past them, exploding. Mal and Zoe hit the ground flat on their backs. Mal starts laughing. Zoe looks long-suffering.

ZOE

(entering foxhole, to Bendis)

Nice cover fire.

MAL

Did you see that? 

Green, what's our  status on...

Mal trails off as he realizes Green is pretty damn wounded, 

possibly deader than a dead thing.

MAL

Zoe.

She looks up. Mal points. 

Zoe moves to check Green. 

Mal moves to sit near Bendis.

MAL (cont'd)

Hey, listen to me. Bendis, look at me! 

Listen, we're holding this valley no matter what.

BENDIS

We're gonna die.

MAL

We're not gonna die. 

We can't die, Bendis.

You know why?

(beat)

Because we are so very, very pretty. 

We are just too pretty for God to let us die. Huh? 

Look at that chiseled jaw. Huh? 

C'mon.

There's a roaring sound overhead. 

Zoe is listening on the radio.

MAL (cont'd)

If you won't listen to me, 

listen to that. 

Those are Our Angels comin' 

to blow The Alliance to The Hot Place.

(to Zoe)

Zoe, tell the 82nd --

ZOE (stunned)

They're Not Coming.

(beat)

Command says it's too hot. 

They're pulling out.

 

We're to lay down arms.

Mal's stunned, in denial. 

He looks at Bendis.

MAL

But what's...

Slowly, Mal stands and peeks over the top of the foxhole. 

His face is lit from their air support rising and retreating. 

Bendis stands next to him. 

Mal's in shock, watching 

His Last Hope pull out of The Fight.

Beside him, Bendis is hit by Enemy Fire 

and Falls. Mal doesn't notice.

PUSH IN on Mal's bloody face. 

On the disbelief.