Mallrats (Superman)
T.S.:
But they're engaged.
Brodie:
Doesn't matter, it can't happen.
T.S.:
Why not? It's bound to come up.
Brodie:
It's impossible,
Lois could never have
Superman's Baby.
Do you think her fallopian tubes could handle the sperm?
I guarantee you he blows a load
just like a shotgun right through her back.
What about her womb?
Do you think it's strong enough to carry his child?
T.S.:
Sure, why not?
Brodie:
He's an alien, for Christ's sake,
his Kryptonian biological makeup is enhanced
by Earth's yellow sun --
If Lois gets a tan
the kid could kick
right through her stomach.
Only someone like Wonder Woman
has a strong enough uterus to carry his kid.
The only way he could bang regular chicks
is with a Kryptonite condom --
That would kill him.
T.S.:
How is it that I go from the verge of
hot Floridian sex with Brandi
to Man of Steel coital debates
with you in the food court?
Brodie:
The Cookie stand isn't
part of the food court.
T.S.:
Of course it is.
Brodie:
The food court is downstairs,
The cookie stand is upstairs.
It not like we're talking
Quantum Physics here.
T.S.:
The cookie stands counts as an eatery,
Eateries' are a part of the food court.
Brodie:
Bullshit.
Eateries that operate within
The Designated Square downstairs
count as The Food Court.
Anything outside of said Designated Square
counts as An Autonomous Unit for Mid-Mall Snacking.
Now, if you're going to wax intellectual about the subject --
[notices Rene at the clothing store]
Holy shit!
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