My Yard

[Trial room]

VALEYARD: 

Members of The Court, 

We have just witnessed a typical 

glorious escapade of The Doctor. 

Mr. Six : 

Madam! I ask that The Court protect Me 

from the abuse of The Brickyard here. 

VALEYARD: 

How pathetic and juvenile are 

Your Attempts at humour. 

INQUISITOR: 

Gentlemen, may I remind you, 

This is A Court of Law, 

not a Debating Society for 

maladjusted, psychotic sociopaths. 

You will both conduct yourselves 

in an orderly manner 

and show proper respect 

for the judicial procedure. 

I hope I make myself very clear. 

(The Doctor and the Valeyard bow.) 

INQUISITOR: 

And Doctor, The Prosecuting Counsel's Title 

is The Valeyard --

Not The Brickyard, Backyard, 

Knacker's Yard or any other kind of yard. 

Again, do I make myself clear? 

Mr. Six : 

Piercingly and Irrefutably so, Madam. 

INQUISITOR: 

Proceed. 

VALEYARD: 

As I was Saying, We have just witnessed 

a sequence in The Doctor's History 

which illustrated perfectly 

his almost gleeful pleasure 

in interfering in the development 

of alien life forms. 

Mr. Six : 

I object! 

INQUISITOR: 

Sit down and shut up! 

VALEYARD: 

Thank you, Sagacity. 

Mr. Six : 

Sagacity? You Sycophant! 

Since when has that been 

a form of address used 

in a Gallifreyan Court of Law? 

VALEYARD: 

I am simply showing respect to our learned Inquisitor. 

INQUISITOR: 

An attitude I much approve. 

Mr. Six : 

Well, you would, wouldn't you? 

'Sagacity', indeed.... 

INQUISITOR: 

Doctor! Continue. 

VALEYARD: 

I should now like to present 

The Doctor's next frightening adventure. 

In fact, the one in which he was engaged 

when removed from Time 

and brought to This Court. 

(The Doctor raises his arm.) 

INQUISITOR: 

Doctor? 

Mr. Six : 

What about The Box? 

INQUISITOR: 

The Box? 

Mr. Six : 

And the fact that Earth 

was two light years away 

from its original position? 

VALEYARD: 

That is not relevant to this segment of evidence. 

Mr. Six : 

It was relevant enough to be bleeped 

from The Matrix record. 

INQUISITOR: 

The Valeyard is quite right. 

That is a matter for The High Council 

to adjudicate upon. 

It is not The Business of This Trial. 

VALEYARD: 

If we may see from The Doctor's arrival 

on the planet Thoros Beta : 

Twenty fourth century, 

last quarter, fourth year, 

seventh month, third day.

In his book The Pilgrim’s Progress, John Bunyan describes a battle between The Accuser, Apollyon, and Christian in The Valley of Humiliation. 

One of Apollyon’s ploys is to recite a laundry list of Christian’s sins [i.e., Errors, Mistakes and Human Weaknesses] : “Thou didst faint at first setting out, when thou wast almost choked in the Gulf of Despond; thou didst attempt wrong ways to be rid of thy burden, whereas thou shouldst have stayed till thy Prince had taken it off; thou didst sinfully sleep and lose thy choice thing; thou wast also almost persuaded to go back at the sight of the lions; and when thou talkest of thy journey, and of what thou hast heard and seen, thou art inwardly desirous of vain-glory in all that thou sayest or doest.”

Christian’s response to the accuser is full of humility and faith: “All this is True; and much more which thou hast left out : but The Prince whom I serve and honour is merciful and ready to forgive. But besides, these infirmities possessed me in thy country; for there I sucked them in, and I have groaned under them, been sorry for them, and have obtained pardon of my Prince.” 

At the mention of Christ’s forgiveness, Apollyon flies into a rage; Satan The accuser cannot abide the fact that his accusations are overcome by the grace of God in Christ.

Me Doing Him

“Authority 28 caused some problems for me personally because I wrote the story as a favour and then, surprisingly, wasn't paid or acknowledged for it until I called Wildstorm and the situation was quickly resolved. 

I wanted the issue to go out under some whimsical credit like 'The Mock Millar Experience' but otherwise I had no intention of putting my name on it. It was a gag. This is the story of watch gears turning and bureaucratic springs unwinding - hardly the fuel for so much rumour among so few. 

The best bit no-one saw was the first page - another victim of the censor's scythe. My original had a splash page with Jesus Christ, Allah, and Buddha all standing in front of a bullet-pocked wall. Each wears a blindfold and sweats nervously, fag in the lips. A big balloon from off panel reads...'FIRE!'. Turn the page and it goes into the Surgeon's speech before they meet Religimon.”

“Sprinkled throughout Superman and the Authority are some nods towards the writing style of my erstwhile protégé and great mate Mark Millar who lit a fresh fire under The Authority with Frank Quitely in 2000…

‘THING IS SWEETHEART, I PLEDGED YOUR PRECIOUS SOUL TO ENTITIES THAT WERE ANCIENT LONG BEFORE SATAN WAS CONCEIVED IN THE MIND OF MAN.’

… is Me doing Him.

Without War, A Lot of People CAN’T Survive

“There is NO Movie without a bomb, or at LEAST a smashed face —

We are all enjoying it.

When it really HAPPENS, We Say :

“We are Shocked, SHOCKED..!!”

It doesn’t work like that, Life.

Wars are almost inevitable —

because 

economies are 

BUILT on War.

Without War, a lot of People 

can’t Survive.

The Largest Industry 

on The Planet 

is Arms and Armaments.”

The Garden of Death

For years, interpretations of Simberg’s artwork have been a place of mystery for historians and psychologists alike.

However, The Garden of Death is one of the few paintings whose symbolism Simberg explained; typically he preferred to let viewers come to their own conclusions. In a note on one sketch he described the garden as “the place where the dead end up BEFORE going to Heaven”.

Because of this explanation, there is a connection from this piece of artwork to spiritualism.

Furthering this interpretation further, the work is described as having the skeletons symbolize being a friend and performing typical home rituals. Simberg’s juxtaposition of the traditionally frightening imagery of death with the tenderness and humor of his portrayal invite the viewer to consider mortality in a new light.

The image of death as the gardener is considered a significant reference to Simberg’s typology.

The garden used in the work can be seen as philosophical gardens, possibly even pointing to an overall symbol of a new type of religious garden. Following the idea of religious gardens, the gardens created by Simberg follow the Gardens of Eden, the Garden of Christ, and the Garden of Virtues.5 Because Simberg decided to mix both positive and negative characters in the artwork, many leaders within the Catholic Church were left questioning the indirect notion of biblical characters. Many of the Church’s authorities felt irritated and ultimately opposed the artwork.

The painting was a favored subject of Simberg’s and he made several versions using different techniques, including larger fresco version of the painting in the Tampere Cathedral, which also contains other works by Simberg.

Since Simberg gave observers a slight explanation the artwork, many still try to interpret the symbols used in the piece today.

Inferior Divine Power

“When I first read for the part of Q., 

it reminded me of a quote that was once said of Lord Byron — 

and that was, that

He was 

“Mad, Bad, and 

Dangerous to Know.”

— John De Lancie

A skeleton parodies human happiness by playing a hurdy-gurdy while the wheels of his cart crush a man as if his life is of no importance. 

A woman has fallen in the path of the death cart; she has a slender thread which is about to be cut by the scissors in her other hand —

Bruegel’s interpretation of Atropos. 

Nearby another woman in the path of the cart, 

holds in her hand a spindle and distaff, 

classical symbols of the fragility of human life— 

another Bruegel interpretation of Clotho and Lachesis; 

a starving dog nibbles at the face of a dead child she holds. 

Just beside her, a cardinal is helped towards his fate 

by a skeleton who mockingly wears the red hat, 

while a dying king’s barrels of gold and silver coins 

are looted by yet another skeleton; 

oblivious to the fact that a skeleton is warning him with an empty hourglass that his life is about to literally run out of time, the foolish and miserly monarch’s last thoughts still compel him to reach out for his useless and vain wealth, 

seeming unaware of the need for repentance. 

In the centre, an awakening religious pilgrim 

has his throat cut by a robber-skeleton for his money purse; 

above the murder, skeleton-fishermen catch people in a net.

In the bottom right-hand corner, 

a dinner has been broken up and the diners are putting up a futile resistance. 

They have drawn their swords in order to fight the skeletons dressed in winding-sheets; 

no less hopelessly, the court jester takes refuge beneath the dinner table. 

The backgammon board 

and the playing cards 

have been scattered, 

while a skeleton thinly disguised with a mask 

(possibly the face of a corpse) 

empties away the wine flasks. 

Of the menu of the interrupted meal, 

all that can be seen are 

a few pallid rolls of bread 

and an appetiser apparently consisting of a pared human skull. 

Above the table are two women-the one on the left struggles in vain 

while being embraced by a skeleton in a hideous parody of after-dinner amorousness. 

The woman on the right is horrified with the realisation of mortality when a skeleton in a hooded robe mockingly seems to bring another dish, also consisting of human bones, to the table.

In the bottom right-hand corner a musician who plays a lute while his lady sings; both are oblivious to the fact that behind both of them, a skeleton that plays along is grimly aware that the couple can not escape their inevitable doom. 

A cross sits in the centre of the painting. 

The painting shows aspects of everyday life in the mid-sixteenth century, when the risk of plague was very severe. 

Clothes are clearly depicted, as are pastimes such as playing cards and backgammon. 

It shows objects such as musical instruments, an early mechanical clock, scenes including a funeral service, and various methods of execution, including the breaking wheel, the gallows, burning at the stake, and the headsman about to behead a victim who has just taken wine and communion. 

In one scene a human is the prey of a skeleton-hunter and his dogs. In another scene at the left, skeletons drag victims down to be drowned in a pond; a man with a grinding stone around his neck is about to be thrown into the pond by the skeletons—an echoing of Matthew 18.6 and Luke 17.2; on the bridge just above at the right a skeleton is about to strike a prostrate victim with a Falchion.

The Colonialism of Ideology

Col. Breen: 

Mars is dead, nothing there 

but a few scraps of lichen.

Professor Bernard Quatermass: 

Five million years ago it may have been very different. 

Suppose at that time there were living beings on it with techniques that let them visit The Earth at a time when the most highly evolved creatures here, our own ancestors, were only a type of Pliocene ape.

Minister of Defense: 

Go on.

Professor Bernard Quatermass: 

They may have wanted to found another colony, 

when their own world was doomed, 

but couldn't endure our atmosphere, 

so they experimented.

Minister of Defense: 

Oh, and The Insects were responsible?

Professor Bernard Quatermass: 

There is clearly some connection. 

My guess is that those were ape mutations 

being brought back for release on Earth.

Col. Breen: 

And you really believe this was possible? 

That apes were systematically taken from this planet to another and...

Professor Bernard Quatermass: 

Altered, by selective breeding, atomic surgery, 

methods we can't guess, 

and with new faculties 

instilled in them, 

higher intelligence, 

and perhaps something else.

Howell: 

In effect, a colonisation.

Professor Bernard Quatermass: 

It would be a way of 

possessing The Earth. 

Only a colony by proxy, 

but better than leaving 

nothing at all behind.

Howell: 

Surely it had to be carried out on a huge scale.

Professor Bernard Quatermass: 

Yes, if I'm right, if I'm right, 

we've come on a single instance, 

probably an accident, 

a landing that went wrong and they all died. 

The Thames Valley was swamp then.

Minister of Defense: 

You realize what you are implying? 

That we owe our human condition here to the intervention of insects.

Professor Bernard Quatermass: 

I suppose I am.

“So what I’m suggesting is that we start working with that — 

Abandon The Personality; 

Abandon The Individual; 

Abandon The “I” 

Because It’s A Lie,

and It has held us down; 

it’s been like 

A Weight round our necks. 

It was useful for the last two thousand years of history, because it created this out of the chaos that was – and this is more coherent; more useful; more meaningful. It has its problems; everything does; every system has – but we’re getting better.

And I think what we should do is walk away from the crap of the 21st century, and start thinking about what we’ve been experiencing.

My feeling about the 20th century, and about World War II and about Auschwitz and all of that stuff is that we had to go through it. We had to do it. That was humanity’s dark night of the soul, and it will never, ever happen again. But it had to happen.

Every single nightmare image, every image of hell that we have in our minds happened. Everything you can think of; people were flayed, brutalised, gassed, tortured, cut into pieces, turned into pigs – everything you can imagine happened. The world was a wasteland. There were cities completely annihilated. We went through it.

Why did we do that?

Stanislav Grof has a conception of the ‘perinatal matrices‘, which was one of the big influences on the film The Matrix. You might recognise some of this. He says that things that happen to us around birth are really profound, and they have all kinds of weird effects. They effect society, they effect the self; they effect everything. They have reverberations.

And he claims that there are several states, that he calls “Basic Perinatal Matrices”.

The first state is oceanic bliss – which we’re all familiar with, I’m sure. Oceanic fuckin’ bliss, mate. And that is the state of the baby in the womb, untouched – everything is provided for; everthing is there; everything you need will turn up out of the blue.

Basic Perinatal Matrix 2 is a different thing. It’s when the womb starts to turn a little toxic, and begins to suggest we’re about to be expelled. And, y’know, we don’t remember this stuff – what happened? What was the feeling of that fetus in there who suddenly thinks: “My entire universe has been overturned and I’m about to be shit out”? 

Does he know where he’s going? “What the fuck’s this? Y’know, I was happy there. It was cool; I was getting everything I wanted.”

And so on into BPM 4 – which is kind of a release from tension; which is the birth process.

So I’m beginning to think.. as a society – and returning to the idea of ontogeny as history.. phylogeny, or whatever the fuck the word is.. what we’re looking at now is humanity’s process through Grofian matrices.

And what we went through is actually a Stanislav Grof Basic Perinatal Matrix 3 experience.

Every image that he talks about: death camps, control, the idea of people.. babies trapped in tubes.. you’ll recognise all this from The Matrix, as I said.

Oil, mechanisms, machines that hate us; destructive technology.. it all happened.

What if this little baby that is the universe; this little larvae that’s approaching culmination, has had to go through these stages? Because everything does. If you want to get rid of war, how do you get rid of war? You inoculate yourself against war by having the worst fuckin’ war you’ve ever had in your life. And everything after that’s just an aftershock. We’ve done nothing worse than what we did in those few years. Humanity’s never come close to anything like it. We’ve tried; there’s been a few lunatics who’ve tried. But nothing on that scale.

So what if we choose to imagine that humanity has passed through that stage?

We’ve reached the 21st century, and we’re now approaching Basic Perinatal Matrix 4. Which is: victory after war. Which is: the struggle is over. Which is: we’re all here; what do we do next?

There was no apocalypse; there was no Christ. There was no rapture. There is nothing. All this stuff is shit.

There is only us. And we’ve still got another thousand years, and maybe another thousand beyond that, and maybe another twenty thousand beyond that.

What are we gonna do?

Who are we?

Are we gonna stick to these personalities; these bounded, territorial things?

Are we gonna expand ourselves; make ourselves bigger? So that if you happen to like.. [say] ‘world music’ and I don’t, I can tap into your love of ‘world music’, and experience it – and it means something.

So all I’m suggesting here is that we all take up magic. Because basically it works. We can change the world. It’s quite simple; the technology’s there. The Buddhists have been telling us.. as I said, people have been telling us this for so long. And in the last two hundred years, it’s been driven underground and we’ve forgotten.

And people like us are here today to try and recover something of that. And the way to recover it, is to do it. Do the techniques. Go buy an Aleister Crowley book; [or] buy one by Phil Hine or Peter Carroll that’s a bit more up to date, and you don’t have to bother with that 18th century fucking language. But do the shit, and you will find it works.

And We Stand Here Now. This is the counterculture. We are the counterculture.. this is like, this shit. I went to this thing in, like, 1987 and it was Robert Anton Wilson and the whole deal – and I remember sitting in the audience thinking “fuck, rave is dead”. Because it was that kind of thing; that version of it’s dead. The hippy version of it’s dead.

We stand here. 

And we’re looking ahead. 

What are we gonna do?

Abandon The Personality 

is what I suggest.

Get rid of the Sense of Self. 

Get rid of the sense of “I”, 

and 

Make yourself 

something bigger. 

Imagine that every time you want to learn something new, it’s a new computer program; you can buy the operating system; the update. You can learn to fly a plane in seven days according to Neuro-Linguistic Programming – so why not? Let’s do it.

Do we want to change things? Or are we just sitting here talking?

No answer.

A.I. Guy

All A.I. Guy scenes in Upload - Season 1(2020)

Germs

“So these things, I met them. And what they were were, like, silver.. like those things you get in rave videos.. silver, morphing, mercurial blobs of chrome, that think. And they took me to the fifth dimension. And the fifth dimension is outside space and time, and they explained to me what time is all about.

The Universe we live in is designed to grow larvae. Right? Believe.. you don’t have to believe me; I’m just setting the story here.

They explained to me that beyond Space and Time, We have our actual selves. These things that we’re experiencing right now are sections through Time. Everyone here is a section through time. But in actual fact, you’re not experiencing your real body. What is your real body? Your real body is a process. It starts when you’re born, and it moves forward until you die. That is You. Seen from outside, that’s what you look like. You look like a gigantic centipede, spread around all the little things that you always do: up and down through your house, up the stairs, down to the store and back – and it’s a centipede, and it’s us. It starts as a little baby and it comes out of your mother’s womb, and it gets bigger.

That is the process in Time. Like I said : We’re experiencing sections now, so we don’t spend a lot of time thinking about this. But think of ourselves as processes through Time, which is what we actually are.

We all know we were twelve, we all know we were ten years old. But where is that? Point to it. Show me you at ten years old – and yet you were there.

So these things said to me : "This is what’s going on. We use time to grow larvae, because outside Space and Time you can’t grow anything. Because it’s timeless, nothing grows. What you wanna do, if you want to make one of these higher dimensional beings – that’s actually Us, already – is that you grow it in time. So you make a universe.

And how you make a universe is : you plug a little part of yourself into the information world that they live in – which is what I seemed to be experiencing; this kind of sea of pure information – and they exist in that, but there is no Time. Time is part of that.. but this is the fifth dimension; it’s like : Time, Space, Breadth, Depth.. plus.

And They said to Me: "The Universe You Live in, The World You’re Living in, is a larva. Every single one of Us here is the same thing. There’s no distinction. All We do is.. We don’t understand what we are.

And they explained to me: if you’ve got a two-dimensional field, see; a flat plane, and you stick your hand through it – there’s one hand there, but if you stick your hand through a two-dimensional plane, the two-dimensional entities who live on there, they will see four circles. Right? Four distinct, completely different circles. But no, it’s the one hand.

Every one of us in here is the same fucker. We’re all the same thing, according to these weirdos. And what we are is.. thank you… I’m pleased someone agrees. And what we are is intersections through 4D space-time.

So yeah, I look like this. I stop here. No, I don’t stop here. I’ve been here for, what, five minutes now? Where was that guy who was here five minutes ago? Where is he? Point to him. But he existed; you all saw him. I saw you five minutes ago. Where is that guy?

So this led me into some very strange alleyways.

These things explained to me that.. as I say, the universe is some kind of larval entity. What it does is it proceeds through stages of development.

Now if you think about a foetus in the womb – and there’s a famous phrase that says.. what is it? Phylogeny recapitulates.. y’know, Evolution or whatever the fuck it is.

Y’know, I forget the good bits.

But it’s the idea that if you’ve got a foetus, it starts off.. like every living thing, it starts as a unicellular entity, it splits.. it becomes a lizard; it becomes a mammal; eventually it becomes a human.

And they said to me: the culture you’re living in is.. understand it this way: Phylogeny recapitulates History.

So what we’re actually watching is this thing coming towards self-awareness and coherence in the same way that a foetus does. We haven’t even been born yet. There are no adults on this planet.

There’s not one adult on this planet.

Which explains a lot.”

Beans

Fiery Serpents

Numbers 

Chapter 21

And when king Arad the Canaanite, which dwelt in the south, heard tell that Israel came by the way of the spies; then he fought against Israel, and took some of them prisoners.

And Israel vowed a vow unto the LORD, and said, If thou wilt indeed deliver this people into my hand, then I will utterly destroy their cities.

And the LORD hearkened to the voice of Israel, and delivered up the Canaanites; and they utterly destroyed them and their cities: and he called the name of the place Hormah.

And they journeyed from mount Hor by the way of the Red sea, to compass the land of Edom: and the soul of the people was much discouraged because of the way.

And the people spake against God, and against Moses, Wherefore have ye brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? for there is no bread, neither is there any water; and our soul loatheth this light bread.

And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.

Therefore the people came to Moses, and said, We have sinned, for we have spoken against the LORD, and against thee; pray unto the LORD, that he take away the serpents from us. And Moses prayed for the people.

And the LORD said unto Moses, Make thee a fiery serpent, and set it upon a pole: and it shall come to pass, that every one that is bitten, when he looketh upon it, shall live.

And Moses made a serpent of brass, and put it upon a pole, and it came to pass, that if a serpent had bitten any man, when he beheld the serpent of brass, he lived.

Oscar Eightball

Just how did the Law get out into the world? Well, David Hill says, John Paul Stapp held his first-ever press conference at Edwards a few weeks after The Incident. And he was attempting to explain his research in clinical terms when a reporter asked the obvious question: “How is it that no one has been severely injured — or worse — during your tests?” Stapp, who Hill says could be something of a showman, replied nonchalantly that, “we do all of our work in consideration of Murphy’s Law.” When the puzzled reporters asked for a clarification Stapp defined The Law and stated, as Hill puts it, “the idea that you had to think through all possibilities before doing a test” so as to avoid disaster.

According to Hill, that was a defining moment. Whether Stapp realized it or not, Murphy’s Law neatly summed up the point of his experiments. They were, after all, dedicated to trying to find ways to prevent bad things — aircraft accidents — from becoming worse. As in fatal. But there was a more significant meaning that went to the very core of the mission of the engineer. From day one of the tests there had been an unacknowledged but standard experimental protocol. The test team constantly challenged each other to think up “what ifs” and to recognize the potential causes of disaster. If you could predict all the possible things that could go wrong, the thinking went, you could also find a way to prevent catastrophe. And save John Stapp’s neck.

If anything can go wrong, it will. It was a concept that seized the cumulative imagination at the press conference. So when articles about the Gee Whiz showed up in print, Murphy’s Law was often cited right along with Newton’s Second.

“I didn’t think here’s some profound statement that been made that will shock The World,” says Hill, expressing amazement that the remark gained such prominence. “It wasn’t made as such. Of course it’s True that if there’s a right way to do something, there’s generally a wrong way to do it also. 

And it’s good to recognise the difference.”

Preparation, Preparation, Preparation.

Jonah


Chapter 1

1

Now the word of the LORD came unto Jonah the son of Amittai, saying,

2

Arise, go to Nineveh, that great city, and cry against it; for their wickedness is come up before me.

3

But Jonah rose up to flee unto Tarshish from the presence of the LORD, and went down to Joppa; and he found a ship going to Tarshish: so he paid the fare thereof, and went down into it, to go with them unto Tarshish from the presence of the LORD.

4

But the LORD sent out a great wind into the sea, and there was a mighty tempest in the sea, so that the ship was like to be broken.

5

Then the mariners were afraid, and cried every man unto his god, and cast forth the wares that were in the ship into the sea, to lighten it of them. But Jonah was gone down into the sides of the ship; and he lay, and was fast asleep.

6

So the shipmaster came to him, and said unto him, What meanest thou, O sleeper? arise, call upon thy God, if so be that God will think upon us, that we perish not.

7

And they said every one to his fellow, Come, and let us cast lots, that we may know for whose cause this evil is upon us. So they cast lots, and the lot fell upon Jonah.

8

Then said they unto him, Tell us, we pray thee, for whose cause this evil is upon us; What is thine occupation? and whence comest thou? what is thy country? and of what people art thou?

9

And he said unto them, I am an Hebrew; and I fear the LORD, the God of heaven, which hath made the sea and the dry land.

10

Then were the men exceedingly afraid, and said unto him, Why hast thou done this? For the men knew that he fled from the presence of the LORD, because he had told them.

11

Then said they unto him, What shall we do unto thee, that the sea may be calm unto us? for the sea wrought, and was tempestuous.

12

And he said unto them, Take me up, and cast me forth into the sea; so shall the sea be calm unto you: for I know that for my sake this great tempest is upon you.

13

Nevertheless the men rowed hard to bring it to the land; but they could not: for the sea wrought, and was tempestuous against them.

14

Wherefore they cried unto the LORD, and said, We beseech thee, O LORD, we beseech thee, let us not perish for this man's life, and lay not upon us innocent blood: for thou, O LORD, hast done as it pleased thee.

15

So they took up Jonah, and cast him forth into the sea: and the sea ceased from her raging.

16

Then the men feared the LORD exceedingly, and offered a sacrifice unto the LORD, and made vows.

17

Now the LORD had prepared a great fish to swallow up Jonah. And Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights.

Chapter 2

1

Then Jonah prayed unto the LORD his God out of the fish's belly,

2

And said, I cried by reason of mine affliction unto the LORD, and he heard me; out of the belly of hell cried I, and thou heardest my voice.

3

For thou hadst cast me into the deep, in the midst of the seas; and the floods compassed me about: all thy billows and thy waves passed over me.

4

Then I said, I am cast out of thy sight; yet I will look again toward thy holy temple.

5

The waters compassed me about, even to the soul: the depth closed me round about, the weeds were wrapped about my head.

6

I went down to the bottoms of the mountains; the earth with her bars was about me for ever: yet hast thou brought up my life from corruption, O LORD my God.

7

When my soul fainted within me I remembered the LORD: and my prayer came in unto thee, into thine holy temple.

8

They that observe lying vanities forsake their own mercy.

9

But I will sacrifice unto thee with the voice of thanksgiving; I will pay that that I have vowed. Salvation is of the LORD.

10

And the LORD spake unto the fish, and it vomited out Jonah upon the dry land.

Jonah
Chapter 3

1

And the word of the LORD came unto Jonah the second time, saying,

2

Arise, go unto Nineveh, that great city, and preach unto it the preaching that I bid thee.

3

So Jonah arose, and went unto Nineveh, according to the word of the LORD. Now Nineveh was an exceeding great city of three days' journey.

4

And Jonah began to enter into the city a day's journey, and he cried, and said, Yet forty days, and Nineveh shall be overthrown.

5

So the people of Nineveh believed God, and proclaimed a fast, and put on sackcloth, from the greatest of them even to the least of them.

6

For word came unto the king of Nineveh, and he arose from his throne, and he laid his robe from him, and covered him with sackcloth, and sat in ashes.

7

And he caused it to be proclaimed and published through Nineveh by the decree of the king and his nobles, saying, Let neither man nor beast, herd nor flock, taste any thing: let them not feed, nor drink water:

8

But let man and beast be covered with sackcloth, and cry mightily unto God: yea, let them turn every one from his evil way, and from the violence that is in their hands.

9

Who can tell if God will turn and repent, and turn away from his fierce anger, that we perish not?

10

And God saw their works, that they turned from their evil way; and God repented of the evil, that he had said that he would do unto them; and he did it not.

Jonah


Chapter 4

1

But it displeased Jonah exceedingly, and he was very angry.

2

And he prayed unto the LORD, and said, I pray thee, O LORD, was not this my saying, when I was yet in my country? Therefore I fled before unto Tarshish: for I knew that thou art a gracious God, and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repentest thee of the evil.

3

Therefore now, O LORD, take, I beseech thee, my life from me; for it is better for me to die than to live.

4

Then said the LORD, Doest thou well to be angry?

5

So Jonah went out of the city, and sat on the east side of the city, and there made him a booth, and sat under it in the shadow, till he might see what would become of the city.

6

And the LORD God prepared a gourd, and made it to come up over Jonah, that it might be a shadow over his head, to deliver him from his grief. So Jonah was exceeding glad of the gourd.

7

But God prepared a worm when the morning rose the next day, and it smote the gourd that it withered.

8

And it came to pass, when the sun did arise, that God prepared a vehement east wind; and the sun beat upon the head of Jonah, that he fainted, and wished in himself to die, and said, It is better for me to die than to live.

9

And God said to Jonah, Doest thou well to be angry for the gourd? And he said, I do well to be angry, even unto death.

10

Then said the LORD, Thou hast had pity on the gourd, for the which thou hast not laboured, neither madest it grow; which came up in a night, and perished in a night:

11

And should not I spare Nineveh, that great city, wherein are more than sixscore thousand persons that cannot discern between their right hand and their left hand; and also much cattle?