COVER UP: Behind the Iran Contra Affair (full documentary)
"Oliver North is here -- "
HST : He's been everywhere hasn't he, that bastard.
Hey, you talk about a guy who had fun?
Oliver North had about as much fun as anybody's
had for about five years, in government -- no one knows
who was running The White House, it turns out that Oliver North
was running The Foreign Policy and Oliver North --
for six years or so had the run of the whole world --
he could rent Switzerland;
he's got whole fleets of Danish boats;
The Government's not involved in Central America, did you hear...?
Yeah, this is a bunch of renegades, who were prowling around
naked in The White House basement, fucking the secretaries, and -- they got noMoney, nobody has -- nobody transferred any money to The Contras
yet they said they got $100,000, but he came from somewhere else;
however North had what three days that Ed Meese gave him
in order to clear out and shredall the files
on this hideous criminal operation --
That means he knew all about it, Meese --
Four peopleknew about it --
it was Meese, Bush, [Donald] Regan and North
he probably saw --
"....andFawn Hall --!!"
HST : Well she was -- that's why
They gave her immunity;
she didn't know all about it so
they've given her immunity on the shredding --
So when the whistle was blown on them when this Syrian paper in Iran blew the whistle on the arms deal
and the ratswent wild in Washington after that, he's said to Oliver North,
who had been a real champion -- he was a Dick Tracy, the hero
means everything is the administration ...how he did that I'll never know -- so here's Ollie North
without putting this in in there was Hawk was Fawn Hall for three days trying to get rid of The Documents, now --
have you seenthe documents they got out of there, Ye Gods!
What came out of there was a monster file ofhorrible gibberish
in here what the hell were they doing down there, Ollie North is Fawn Hall
and probably that son of that Contra that Cruiser much the same little maniac who was promising to marry one Hall here's a contra leader in the White House Situation Room and yet FC basement with a secretary all the time with Oliver North and and they they shredded everything they could and they tried to get the computer clean and they couldn't do any of it George Bush had no fun Oliver North had fun
".....what was Bush's role? George Bush's role?
HST : He, I haven't --- I suspect, my feeling is he is the most guilty of all
yeah we have a story here that's gonna be worse than Watergate much deeper is dirty would cost you end up Iceland yeah I get this a little bit no I can sleep on people and yeah bring them in they
teensy little pecker, is give a giggle. That's all.
She didn't KNOW no better.
Going to hang them, Little Bill?
LITTLE BILL stares at her and then slowly turns and exits.
ALICE and SKINNY follow him.
INT NIGHT SKINNY’S
The two cowboys are tied up
in the middle of the floor.
LITTLE BILL, ALICE, and
SKINNY enter from upstairs.
LITTLE BILL
Clyde, step over to the office
and get the bull whip.
ALICE
A whipping? That's all they
get after what they done?
LITTLE BILL
A whipping ain't no littlething, Alice
ALICE
For what THEY done they deserve MORE.
SKINNY
Alice, shut up! Little Bill,
a whippingain't going to SETTLE this.
(showing The Paper)
This here is a lawful contract between me
and Delilah Fitzgerald, the cut whore.
I brought her clear from Boston,
I paid her expenses and all, and
I've got a contract here that
representsan investment of Capital.
LITTLE BILL
(sympathetic toThe Argument)
PROPERTY.
SKINNY
Damaged property. Like if I was to
hamstring one of their cow ponies.
LITTLE BILL
So you figure nobody will
want to fuck her now, right?
SKINNY
Hell NO, least ways
they won't PAY to do it.
Maybe she can clean up the place
or something, but nobody's going to pay
good money for a cut upwhore.
LITTLE BILL You boys off the Bar T.
You got your own string ponies?
DAVEY Yeah, I got four.
(MIKE does not answer. LITTLE BILL kicks him)
MIKE Six.
LITTLE BILL I Guess you'd just as soon
not have a trial. No fuss, huh?
DAVEY Uh, no sir.
LITTLE BILL Alright, you did the cuttin’
so come this fall you bring in five ponies
and you give them over to Skinny here.
MIKE Five?
LITTLE BILL And you... you bring in two,
you give them over, you hear?
DAVEY Yes, sir.
CLYDE Here's your bull whip, Little Bill.
LITTLE BILL Maybe we won't need this whip now. Let me tell you come the spring, if Skinny doesn't have those ponies (he cracks the whip) I'm going to come looking for you.
ALICE You ain't even going to whip them?
LITTLE BILL Well, fined them instead, Alice.
ALICE For what THEY done?
Skinny get's some ponies, and that's it?
That ain't fair, Little Bill. That ain't fair!
(LITTLE BILL grabs her
and pulls her towards him.)
LITTLE BILL Haven't you seen
enough blood for one night, Huh?
Hell, Alice, it ain't like they were tramps,
or loafers or bad men, you know there were
just hard working boys who were foolish.
If they was given over to Wickedness
in a regular way then I could see...
ALICE Like whores?
SKINNY Alice! tend to Delilah.
LITTLE BILL Go ahead.
INT DAYDELILAH'S ROOM
(The women are sitting around a bed
where DELILAH lies unconscious.)
SILKY I got eighty five dollars.
KATE I don't know, if Delilah doesn't care
one way or the other what are we all getting
so riled up about?
ALICE Just because we let them smelly foolsride us like horses don't mean we gotta let them BRAND us like horses.
Can you imagine yourself writing a screenplay? Have you tried?
David Foster Wallace:
No, I haven't tried. I've talked a couple times, my best friend writes mysteries and he and I have talked about doing a screenplay. I think, I think I would have a very difficult time writing something that's a product that other people would mess with. And the amount of money that's at stake in movies and the amount of, the dispersal of responsibility for the thing, I mean, the director, the actors,
the producer, in order to do,
writing is very difficult for me and
it takes a lot of time and energy.
And once I've done it, it's my thing.
I can't imagine putting in the time
and energy to do a good screenplay,
I mean, something like what
David Webb Peoples can do.
He's a screenwriter I think
is really, really superb.
Charlie Rose:
What's he written?
David Foster Wallace:
He's written "Blade Runner"
and he wrote "Unforgiven,"
the Clint Eastwood Western which --
Charlie Rose:
Did youlike it?
David Foster Wallace:
I thought -- "Unforgiven"?
Charlie Rose:
Yeah.
David Foster Wallace:
I thought "Unforgiven" is the first
really smart Western since,
I don't know, early Peckinpah.
Charlie Rose:
I do, too. I loved it.
David Foster Wallace:
What's interesting is I don't know
a single female who likes the film.
It's very odd. I talk to all these people --
Charlie Rose:
It's interesting you say that.
David Foster Wallace:
-- about "Unforgiven"
Charlie Rose:
It's interesting you
say that because --
David Foster Wallace:
-- and females think,
"Western? It stinks."
And if you can get them to watch it,
it's not a Western at all.
I mean, it's a moral drama.
It's, you know, it's Henry James,
basically. But it's very odd.
Charlie Rose:
My girlfriend and I --
Amanda hates the film
and it's the one film that I just have
a wider difference with her than
any other film that
we've seen together.
David Foster Wallace:
Yeah. If I were going to try to do something,
I'd want to do something like that.
But that was also an enormous
success story, luck story.
David Webb Peoples,
reclusive, weird screenwriter
I don't know much about him.
This script had been shopped around for years and finally Clint Eastwood bought it and Clint Eastwood's got enough juice to go, "Okay, I'll star in it so they'll make it."
This was a weird Western.
This is very cerebral for a Western
and I think the only way that
it could have got made
was if a, you know, star director, you know, was willing to do it. And the thing about it is, I think for every script like that that gets made, they've got to be, you know, hundreds of these really intelligent, cool scripts --37:33Charlie Rose: Absolutely, that there's not somebody that comes along who has the power to get it made.37:36David Foster Wallace: Right. Or else it gets worked on by the rewrite guys, you know, and John Gregory Dunne's got that whole book, "Monster" --37:43Charlie Rose: "Monster," yeah.37:44David Foster Wallace: -- about, you know, their working on the Jessica Savitch story, which became, you know, what was it --37:48Charlie Rose: "Up Close and" something --37:49David Foster Wallace: -- "Up Close and Personal," which was --37:50Charlie Rose: Michele Pfeiffer.37:52David Foster Wallace: -- a film so bad it doesn't even have charm. You know, some things are so bad that they're enjoyable. This was worse than that.37:59Charlie Rose: I know. It was. It was. How about writing essays? I did an interview the other night, not on television, but, with Alfred Kazin. I mean, the kind of thing that he does -- does that appeal to you, in a sense?38:09David Foster Wallace: I think of myself as a fiction writer and I'm not even a particularly experienced fiction writer, so a lot, like, a lot of the essays in this book, if there's a schtick, the schtick is, "Oh, gosh, look at me, not a journalist, who's been sent to do all these journalistic things."38:21Charlie Rose: Yeah, but I mean, as some critic wrote about you, you have two things that are, that most journalists wish they had. One is a great, you have a great memory for the phrase, the delivered phrase --38:31David Foster Wallace: Yeah.38:32Charlie Rose: And you also have a great power of observation for the moment.38:35David Foster Wallace: Oh --38:37Charlie Rose: You'd agree with that?38:39David Foster Wallace: I would agree with that and the things, the things in this book that most people like are the sensuous or experiential essays, which is basically an enormous eyeball floating around something, reporting what it sees.38:49Charlie Rose: Yeah.38:51David Foster Wallace: When you're talking about Kazin, you're talking about something different, which is, you know, the art essay, the belles lettres --38:56Charlie Rose: Right. Exactly.38:58David Foster Wallace: -- essay. I think there are one, maybe a couple like that in there, but I -- I have this problem of thinking that I haven't made myself clear or that the argument hasn't been sufficiently hammered home, so I will make the same point five, six, seven times. And I did, the "E Unibus Plurum" thing in there is an argumentative essay that I did six or seven years ago and I just gave up after that because it seems as if, to make the argument truly persuasive requires 500, 600 pages and nobody wants to read it.39:23Charlie Rose: Yeah. Talking about style, what's the, what are the footnotes about? I mean, is that just simply --39:30David Foster Wallace: The -- in "Infinite Jest," the end notes are very intentional and they're in there for certain structural reasons and -- well, you don't need to hear about it. It's sort of embarrassing to read this book. You could almost chart when the essays were written because the first couple don't have any. But the footnotes get very, very addictive.39:44Charlie Rose: Right.39:46David Foster Wallace: I mean, it's almost like having a second voice in your head.39:49Charlie Rose: But where does it come from? I mean I'm now on page 981 of "Infinite Jest" and the footnotes run, notes and errata, run to page, you may know the answer to this, but there are 200 --39:57David Foster Wallace: Yes, but the reader doesn't experience it in that way because the end note tags are --40:00Charlie Rose: Three-oh-four --40:02David Foster Wallace: -- in the text.40:03Charlie Rose: Three hundred and four footnotes, sir.40:04David Foster Wallace: There are, there are quite a few. Not, some of them are very short. Some of them are only one line long. It is a way, no, see, this is --40:10Charlie Rose: This is what?40:11David Foster Wallace: Well, I'm just going to look pretentious talking about this.40:13Charlie Rose: Why, quit worrying about how you're going to look and just be!40:17David Foster Wallace: I have got news for you. Coming on a television show stimulates your "What am I going to look like?" gland like no other experience. You may now be such a veteran that you're, like, you don't notice anymore.40:25Charlie Rose: Yeah.40:28David Foster Wallace: You confront your own vanity when you think about going on TV. So I'm, no apologies, but just that's an explanation. The, the footnotes in the -- there's a way that, there's a way, it seems to me, that reality's fractured right now, at least the reality that I live in. And the difficulty about writing one of those writing about that reality, is that text is very linear and it's very unified and you, I, anyway, am constantly on the lookout for ways to fracture the text that aren't totally disoriented. I mean, you can, you know, you can take the lines and jumble them up and that's nicely fractured, but nobody nobody's going to read it, right? So you've got, here's got to be some interplay between how difficult you make it for the reader and how seductive it is for the reader so the reader's willing to do it. The end notes were, for me, a useful compromise, although there were a lot more when I delivered the manuscript. And one of the things that the editor did for me was had me pare the end notes down to really the absolutely essential.41:23Charlie Rose: Who's your editor?41:24David Foster Wallace: His name is Michael Pietsch --41:26Charlie Rose: Yeah.41:28David Foster Wallace: -- spelled P-I-E-T-S-C-H, not like the fruit, senior editor at Little Brown and a fine individual.41:34Charlie Rose: What did it do to you, Newsweek, "Truly remarkable. What weird fun 'Infinite Jest' is to read." The New York Times, "Uproarious. It shows off Wallace as one of the big talents of his generation, a writer of virtuosic talents who can seemingly do anything." That's the way I feel about you. I mean, I, I'm a little bit, I mean I hear a brain at work there, sort of,- where do you want it to go? What is it --41:54David Foster Wallace: I think not exploding would be a nice start. That kind of stuff -- I'm -- I dissociate very well --42:00Charlie Rose: Yeah.42:02David Foster Wallace: -- and it's a useful talent. Writing for publication is a very weird thing because part of you, part of you is a nerd and you want to sit in libraries, you don't want to be bothered and you're very shy. And another part of you is the worst ham of all time. "Look at me. Look at me. Look at me." And you have fantasies about writing something that makes everybody drop to one knee, you know, like Al Jolson or something. We -- of course, you never get it as much as that part wants, but to get a little bit of it is just, is very, very strange because very often, for me I didn't read a whole lot of the reviews, but a lot of the positive ones seemed to me to misunderstand the book. I wanted it to be extraordinarily sad and not particularly post-modern or jumbled up or fractured and most of the people, the reviewers who really liked it seemed to like it because it was funny or it was erudite or it was interestingly fractured, so --42:51Charlie Rose: What does "post-modern" mean in literature?42:53David Foster Wallace: No, no, no, no. After modernism" is what it means.42:57Charlie Rose: Okay.43:00David Foster Wallace: -- what it means. It's a very useful catch-all term because you say it and we all nod soberly, as if we know what we're talking about --43:05Charlie Rose: As if we know what it means --43:07David Foster Wallace: -- and in fact we don't. There are certain, what I mean by post-modern, I'm talking about maybe the black humorists who came along in the 1960s, the post-Nabokovians. I'm talking about Pynchon and Barthelme and Barth.43:18Charlie Rose: Yeah.43:22David Foster Wallace: DeLillo in the early '70s, Coover. I'm sure I'm leaving out a lot. Let me see --43:27Charlie Rose: But that's the camp you put yourself in.43:30David Foster Wallace: I think I think that's the camp that interested me when I was a student. The problem is, I think post-modernism has, to a large extent, run its course. The biggest, thing for me about, that was interesting about post-modernism is that it was the first text that was highly self-conscious, self-conscious of itself as text, self-conscious of the writer as persona, self-conscious about the effects that narrative had on readers and the fact that the readers probably knew that. It was the first generation of writers who'd actually read a lot of criticism --43:58Charlie Rose: Yeah.44:01David Foster Wallace: -- and there was a certain schizophrenia bout it. It was very useful, it seems to me, because the culture, this was a real beaker of acid in the face of the culture, the culture at the time that this came out. This was before, you know, the youth rebellion in the '60s. It was very staid and very conservative and very Alfred Kazin-ish. And the problem, though, is that a lot of the schticks of post-modernism, irony, cynicism, irreverence, are now part of whatever it is that's enervating in the culture itself, right? Burger King now sells hamburgers with "You gotta break the rules," right? So I'm, I don't really consider myself a post-modernist. I don't consider myself much of anything, but I know that that's the tradition. that excited me when I was starting to write.44:40Charlie Rose: Paul --44:43David Foster Wallace: Is that anything like an answer to your question?44:48Charlie Rose: It is. I mean, Paul Cezanne, the painter, always felt that he had, I mean, up until the end of his life, until he created "The Bathers" in, like, 1907, always felt like he had to create a big painting, a big painting both in terms of size, but in terms of a great piece of work, you know? Do you think about that?45:09David Foster Wallace: Well, see, it's, a book is a different kind of object than a painting. A painting, however big it is, is taken in all at once. Size is an entirely different component of it. For a book, a big book means the reader is going to have to spend a long time reading it, which means your burden of proof goes up, right? Big books, big books are more challenging. They're more intimidating. So, you know, if you're talking about "Infinite Jest," I have a problem with length and it's one reason why I'm grateful to have found a really good editor. "Infinite Jest" did not start out to be this long. It started out to be a fractured, multiple narrative with a number of main characters and it became -- perhaps I was just in denial that this was going to require great length. And at a certain point, it became clear that it was going to be very long.45:51Charlie Rose: All right.45:52David Foster Wallace: Feminists are always saying this. Feminists are saying white males say, "Okay, I'm going to sit down and write this enormous book and impose my phallus on the consciousness of the world."46:00Charlie Rose: And you say?46:02David Foster Wallace: I, I, if that was going on, it was going on on a level of awareness I do not want to have access to.46:06Charlie Rose: Do you still play tennis?46:07David Foster Wallace: I do play tennis. I no longer play competitively.46:10Charlie Rose: You played as a junior.46:12David Foster Wallace: I was --46:14Charlie Rose: And you were competitive and good.46:16David Foster Wallace: I was good. I was not even very good. I was between good and very good. I was good on a regional level. And one of the things about writing the piece about Michael Joyce, who was hundredth in the world and junior champion, is I really had to, had to realize that there were a lot of levels beyond the level that I was on. That , that essay, for me, which I know you haven't asked me about and now I'll tell you about, is, ended up, it's very weird and I'm surprised that Esquire even bought it. It ended up being way more autobiographical than it did, it was supposed to. It was supposed to start out as a profile of this tennis player.46:44Charlie Rose: But it was about you.46:45David Foster Wallace: Yeah. Unfortunately, a lot of these, I think, end up being about me.46:48Charlie Rose: I think so, too.46:51David Foster Wallace: As a couple reviewers have pointed out.46:52Charlie Rose: But, and then, therefore, back to David Lynch. How is that about you?46:56David Foster Wallace: I'm trying to think of a way so that this will have anything to do with what we've talked about before. Imagine you're a hyper-educated avant garde-ist in grad school learning to write.47:04Charlie Rose: Right.47:06David Foster Wallace: The screen gets all fuzzy now as the viewer's invited to imagine this. Coming out of an avant garde tradition, I get to this grad school and at the grad school, turns out all the teachers are realists. They're not at all interested in post-modern avant garde stuff. Now, there's an interesting delusion going on here -- so they don't like my stuff. I believe that it's not because my stuff isn't good, but because they just don't happen to like this kind of esthetic. In fact, known to them but unknown to me, the stuff was bad, was indeed bad. So in the middle of all this, hating the teachers, but hating them for exactly the wrong reason, this was spring of 1986, I remember, I remember who I went to see the movie with, "Blue Velvet" comes out. "Blue Velvet" comes out. "Blue Velvet" is a type of surrealism it may have some, it may have debts. There's a debt to Hitchcock somewhere. But it is an entirely new and original kind of surrealism. It no more comes out a previous tradition or the post-modern thing. It is completely David Lynch. And I don't know how well you or your viewers would remember the film, but there are some very odd -- there's a moment when a guy named "the yellow man" is shot in an apartment and then Jeffrey, the main character, runs into the apartment and the guy's dead, but he's still standing there. And there's no explanation. You know, he's just standing there. And it is, it's almost classically French, Francophilistically surreal, and yet it seems absolutely true and absolutely appropriate. And there was this, I know I'm taking a long time to answer your question. There was this way in which I all of a sudden realized that the point of being post-modern or being avant garde or whatever wasn't to follow in a certain kind of tradition, that all that stuff is B.S. imposed by critics and camp followers afterwards, that what the really great artists do, and it sounds very trite to say it out loud, but what the really great artists do is they're entirely themselves. They're entirely themselves. They've got their own vision, their own way of fracturing reality, and that if it's authentic and true, you will feel it in your nerve endings. And this is what "Blue Velvet" did for me. I'm not suggesting it would do it for any other viewer, but I, Lynch very much helped snap me out of a kind of adolescent delusion that I was in about what sort of avant garde art could be. And it's very odd because film and books are very different media. But I remember, I remember going with two poets and one other student fiction writer to go see this and then all of us going to the coffee shop afterwards and just, you know, slapping ourselves on the forehead. And it was this truly epiphantic experience.49:24Charlie Rose: Now -- that's right. I -- you feel the same way when you see "Lost Highway," too.49:28David Foster Wallace: I hope so because --49:30Charlie Rose: Same thing, and you walk out and you say, I have no idea. It just was an experience. And it was an experience inside of David Lynch's head.49:36David Foster Wallace: What's weird about Lynch, though --49:37Charlie Rose: And that's what it is. I didn't get any message. I don't --49:40David Foster Wallace: Did you see, did you see "Wild at Heart"?49:42Charlie Rose: No.49:43David Foster Wallace: That was --49:44Charlie Rose: Yeah, I did see it. I did see it.49:45David Foster Wallace: See, I don't think "Wild at Heart" --49:46Charlie Rose: This was Laura Dern and --49:47David Foster Wallace: -- is good at all.49:48Charlie Rose: -- and --49:49David Foster Wallace: Yeah. Yeah. Laura Dern and Nicholas Cage and --49:51Charlie Rose: Right. Right.49:51David Foster Wallace: -- they were great performances.49:52Charlie Rose: Was Willem Dafoe in that?49:53David Foster Wallace: Willem Dafoe was in that --49:54Charlie Rose: Right.49:54David Foster Wallace: -- with black stumps for teeth.49:56Charlie Rose: Right. Right.49:58David Foster Wallace: I mean, there's all kinds of, and it's set up exactly the same way and yet it falls flat. There was some magic that "Blue Velvet" had and I think it has to do with the hoary old concept of a well-developed central character, who is Jeffrey, Kyle MacLachlan, whereas in "Wild at Heart", "Wild at Heart" is a weird, inter-textual allusion to "Fugitive Kind" with Marlon Brando and this Italian actress.50:14Charlie Rose: Yeah. Yeah.50:16David Foster Wallace: And there's all these arch sort of, but there weren't really any characters in it and, so I don't know. The interesting thing about Lynch is, is it going to be absolutely great or is it going to be cringeingly horrible? And I ended up really rooting for "Lost Highway." Get ready for Robert Blake in this movie. I don't know whether you've seen this movie.50:29Charlie Rose: Oh, he's fantastic. He's fantastic.50:30David Foster Wallace: The movie does --50:31Charlie Rose: He's fantastic.50:32David Foster Wallace: This movie does for Blake what "Blue Velvet" did for Dennis Hopper, who, if you remember, was in oblivion before this movie.50:37Charlie Rose: Yeah. Yeah.50:38David Foster Wallace: And now, all of a sudden, you know, he could do Coke commercials if he wanted50:40Charlie Rose: I don't know whether it'll do that for Robert Blake, but, you mean Dennis could?50:42David Foster Wallace: Yeah.50:43Charlie Rose: Dennis could do Coke commercial.50:44David Foster Wallace: Yeah. ROSE Yeah. He could. Yeah.50:46Charlie Rose: I mean, he --50:47David Foster Wallace: But I, my memory of Robert Blake is, you know, "That's the name of that tune," in "Baretta" or something and now, all of a sudden, they've got him made up like Max Schreck in "Nosferatu."50:55Charlie Rose: We're way over time. Let me ask one last question. You have gone through, your personal life is kind of bent to hell and back. Yes?51:01David Foster Wallace: No, I don't think any more than most people my age.51:05Charlie Rose: Oh, come on.51:08David Foster Wallace: Well, most of the people I -51:10Charlie Rose: I mean, do you look at that as simply sort of passing through the valley and coming out -- I mean, come on.51:17David Foster Wallace: I think, I mean, I, I think I got, I got some attention for some work that didn't really deserve it at an age when I had a hard time handling it. And it wasn't a whole lot of attention, but it seemed like a whole lot to, you know, a library weenie from the lower level of Frost Library at Amherst College and I had a hard time with it. And I was lucky enough so that there was something left of my life when it was over. Whatever that means. If you wanted something, like, really exciting or sexy, there isn't much. I just got really --51:47Charlie Rose: Well, but you, I mean, it was drugs and you were suicidal and the whole nine yards, yes?51:52David Foster Wallace: Yeah. Here's why I'm embarrassed talking about it, not because --51:54Charlie Rose: I want to know why.51:56David Foster Wallace: Not because I'm personally ashamed of it, because everybody talks about it. I mean, it sounds like --52:00Charlie Rose: In other words, everybody --52:01David Foster Wallace: It sounds --52:02Charlie Rose: Everybody talks about it for themselves or everybody talks about you?52:05David Foster Wallace: No, everybody talks, it sounds like some kind of Hollywood thing to do. "Oh, he's out of rehab and -- "52:08Charlie Rose: No, I --52:09David Foster Wallace: "--back in action."52:11Charlie Rose: -- didn't say anything about rehab.52:12David Foster Wallace: This, this was --52:14Charlie Rose: No, I said something about the course that took you from Amherst College to, back to Illinois.52:18David Foster Wallace: I did, I did some recreational drugs. I didn't have the, I didn't have the stomach to drink very much and I didn't have the nervous system to do anything very hard. Yeah, I did some drugs. I didn't do as many drugs as most of the people I know my age. What it turned out was I just don't have the nervous system to handle it. That wasn't the problem. The problem was I started out, I think, wanting to be a writer and wanting to get some attention and I got it really quick and --52:37Charlie Rose: By writing.52:38David Foster Wallace: -- and realized it didn't make me happy at all, in which case, "Hmm. Why am I writing?" You know, What's the purpose of this? And I don't think it's substantively different from the sort of thing, you know, somebody who wants to be a really successful cost accountant, right and be a partner of his accounting firm and achieves that at 50 and goes into something like a depression. "The brass ring I've been chasing does not make everything okay." So that's why I'm embarrassed to talk about it. It's just not particularly interesting. It's -- what it is, is very, very average.53:04Charlie Rose: Yeah. Do you see yourself chasing a brass ring now?53:08David Foster Wallace: I, this is what's very interesting is I, there's part of me that wants to get attention and respect. It doesn't really make very much difference to me because I learned in my 20s that it just doesn't change anything and that whatever you get paid attention for is never the stuff that you think is important about yourself anyway. So a lot of my problem right now is I don't really have a brass ring and I'm kind of open to suggestions about what, what one chases that, there are real abstract ideas about, you know, what art can be and the redemptive quality of art and, you know, kindness to animals and, you know, all the cliches that we can invoke. But it's, I, the people who most interest me now are the people, are people who are older and who have sort of been through a mid-life crisis. They tend to get weird because the normal incentives for getting out of bed don't tend to apply anymore. I have not found any satisfactory new ones, but I'm also not getting ready to, you know, jump off a building or anything.53:57Charlie Rose: Well, that's good news. David Foster Wallace -- "A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again," essays and arguments by the author of "Infinite Jest." Thank you.54:04David Foster Wallace: Thank you.