Who Came Up with THAT One?!?

[The Battle of Zaruthstra, 4037 A.D.]

HARCOURT: 

Nurse! Nurse! 

Damn it, where's The Nurse! 

ELEANOR: 

He needs help. 

HARCOURT: 

Madame President, I'm sorry, but we have to go now! 

Those things could be here any second. 

(A little boy is lying on a bed in the tent. He is very still. A Sontaran warrior enters.)

STRAX: 

Did somebody call for a nurse? 

(Strax tends to the boy.)

ARTHUR: 

Will I be okay? 

STRAX: 

Of course you will, my boy!

You'll be up and around in no time. 

And perhaps one day, you and I shall meet on the field of battle, and I will destroy you for the glory of the Sontaran Empire!

ARTHUR: 

Thanks, Nurse.

(Strax leaves, and Harcourt follows him.) 

HARCOURT: 

Commander Strax. 

I just have to ask. 

A Sontaran nurse? 

STRAX: 

I serve a penance to restore the honour of my clone batch. 

It is the greatest punishment a Sontaran can endure, 

to Help The Weak and Sick. 

HARCOURT: 

Who came up with that one? 

(The sound of The TARDIS materialising.) 

STRAX: 

Tonight, though, perhaps my penance is over. 

Captain Harcourt, I hope some day to meet you in the glory of battle, when I shall crush the life from your worthless human form. 

Try and get some rest.