RUBY :
I can't believe this.
I can't believe a single thing
that's happening, and...
it's my birthday.
Ta-Da! :
It's your what now?
RUBY:
Oh, never mind me.
They're going to eat Lulubelle.
What time's dinner?
Ta-Da! :
No, but it's Lulubelle's birthday...
That is such a brilliant name.
I wish I was called Lulubelle.
And is your birthday
on the same day?
RUBY :
Yeah, but it doesn't mean anything.
It's just a coincidence.
Ta-Da! :
Learn The Language -- That's why
They went after Lulubelle :
Coincidence is what
makes The Baby tasty.
That's how these goblins work --
Chance and Coincidence and Luck.
That's how I spotted you --
You've been having lots
of bad luck, yes?
RUBY:
Well... yes, but that-that-that started way back.
I mean, Lulu arrived today. I started having accidents weeks ago.
Ta-Da! :
That was paving The Way.
These goblins are Time-riders.
They can surf the waves of Time.
They spotted the chance of coincidence,
and they went back and they wove you in.
RUBY:
Wait. So They CAUSED my accidents?
Were they trying to kill me?
Ta-Da! : No. No, it's more like er...
If you walk through a day
without any bad luck,
that's fine, that day is nothing.
But if you have
lots of accidents,
it STITCHES you IN --
It weaves You
into the day.
You become all complicated and knotted and vivid.
All of it leading up to a baby on Christmas Eve.
The same birthday as yours, with
a bedroom that is high up in the sky.
All the more convenient for a goblin ship.
Ha! Oh, it's like
A Tapestry.
It's gorgeous!
RUBY:
How do you know all of this?
Ta-Da! :
I don't. This is a brand new science for me, and I love it. The Language of Luck.
Cos what is a coincidence but a form of accident? Two things bumping together unexpectedly. Like you and me.
RUBY: No, but who are you? Why are you an expert in time-travelling goblins and...
Ta-Da! : Oh! Pssh! They are not time travellers. Excuse me. Time travellers are great. Like the best. Like, wow. This lot just bimble.
RUBY: So if they're bimbling, why did they pick on Davina McCall?
Ta-Da! : Oh, that was just fun.
(The Doctor has freed himself.)
RUBY: Wait, how did you do that?
Ta-Da! :
I spent a long, hot summer with
Harry Houdini. Now then...
(The Doctor unties Ruby.)
Ta-Da! : Right. Let me see. Door.
RUBY: Hurry up. They're going to eat the baby.
(He tries the sonic looks-nothing-like-a-screwdriver.
Let's be honest, it is a tricorder.)
Ta-Da! : W
rong world.
RUBY:
Why? What is that thing?
Ta-Da! : Sonic screwdriver. But a screwdriver needs screws. This lot bind everything with knots. Ah...
RUBY: Okay, we've got to get out, because they could be eating the baby any second now.
Ta-Da! : What time were you born?
RUBY: I don't know. They kind of just guessed. Two o'clock? 2pm?
Ta-Da! : Right... So.. Language, tapestry, coincidence --
That must be the time for the feast. What... what time is it now?
RUBY: Five to two.
Ta-Da! : We're circling back to your flat. The pattern is closing. We'd better hurry up.
(Ruby kicks at the hatch to the main area.)
RUBY: Yes! Well, if you gave me a hand!
Ta-Da! : I am learning the vocabulary of rope! This stuff is their version of wires and electricity, so if we... trip the right switch...
(He pulls at a string, and the door opens.)
RUBY: What, you can speak rope?
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