THE INQUISITOR:
Well, Kryten —
Justify Yourself.
KRYTEN:
I'm not sure I can.
INQUISITOR:
But surely Your Life
is replete with Good Works.
There can be few individuals
who have lived
a more selfless life.
KRYTEN:
But I am programmed
to Live unselfishly.
And therefore, any good works I do
come not out of fine motives,
but as a result of a series
of binary commands
I am compelled to obey.
INQUISITOR:
Well then, how can any
mechanical Justify Himself?
KRYTEN:
Perhaps only if he attempted to
break his programming
and conduct His Life
according to a set of values
he arrived at independently.
INQUISITOR:
Your Argument invites deletion.
KRYTEN:
(with only mild smugness)
The Rules are yours, not mine.
INQUISITOR:
Do you wish to be erased?
KRYTEN:
Well, I am programmed not
to wish for anything :
I Serve.
INQUISITOR:
In a Human, this behaviour
might be considered stubborn.
KRYTEN:
But I am not Human.
And neither are you.
And it is not Our Place
to Judge Them.
….I wonder why you do.
The INQUISITOR
closes His Mask.
INQUISITOR:
(In The INQUISITOR Voice)
Enough!
Death :
Let's Rock!
Android Dennis :
It was cool when you said,
"Let's Rock,"
because it made me
want to Rock.
Death :
Uh-huh. You don't just get to Rock.
You got to earn
The Right to Rock.
Android Dennis :
Freeze, Preston/Logan.
Bill :
Oh, this is exactly what
we don't need right now.
Ted :
We can't. We gotta get back
to The Present, like, now.
Bill :
Yeah. Look, we know you were
sent here to Kill Us
if we didn't have The Song.
But we actually do have
The Song now, so...
Android Dennis :
Wait. You have The Song? Oh...
Uh... Mistakes were made.
Apologies are given.
Ted :
You're forgiven.
No problem.
Bill :
But we gotta go, robot dude.
Android Dennis :
Wait! No, must expiate guilt.
Bill :
For what? We're fine, dude.
Ted :
Let us go!
Android Dennis :
For... murdering Family.
Ted :
Wait. What?
Bill :
What are you talking about?
Android Dennis :
I lasered your daughters.
Ted :
You lasered them?
Bill :
You lasered our daughters?
Where are they?
Android Dennis :
Daughters are... in Hell.
Ted :
You sent our daughters to Hell?
Bill :
We have to go get them. Shoot us.
Android Dennis :
I can't shoot you.
You have the song.
Bill :
Well, guess what?
**snap!**
Now there's no song.
Ted :
Now you got no choice, Robot.
You gotta kill us!
Android Dennis :
Can no longer take life.
Bill :
What?
Android Dennis :
Failure. Failure.
Failure. Failure.
Ted :
Dude, we need This Guy to laser us
but he appears to be having some kind
of nervous breakdown.
Bill :
Shoot us, Robot!
Android Dennis :
I can't. I'm A Failure.
I don't even deserve
to live, you know?
Ted :
Shoot us!
Android Dennis :
Can't do it.
Shoot myself.
Ted :
Wait, don't!
Bill :
You can't! We gotta go
save Billie and Thea.
Ted :
Let's do it!
Bill :
Yeah.
Android Dennis :
I'm so sorry!
Goodbye, cruel world!
Bill and Ted Return to Hell
Ted :
It worked!
Bill :
Yeah!
Behind them
Android Dennis falls
into Hell with them
Android Dennis :
...world!
Bill :
That is unexpected.
Ted :
Yeah. How can A Robot
even die?
Bill :
Let's find the girls.
Android Dennis :
Can I come with you?
Ted :
He did kill us.
Bill :
Come on, Robot!
Android Dennis :
Wait. I have A Name.
It's Dennis. Dennis McCoy.
Ted :
Okay. Let's go, Dennis McCoy.
Thea!
Billie!
Android Dennis :
Dennis Caleb McCoy.
That's the full name.
Let's go, dude!
Android Dennis :
I feel gratitude.
Gratitude.
Okay, we get it :
You're a grateful,
totally insecure,
somehow-dead robot named
Dennis Caleb McCoy.
Thea! - Billie! How're we gonna find them, dude? I don't know, dude. Yeah, I don't even know, dude. Thea! Billie!
Hellion #1 :
Oh... They were very nice.
Hellion #2 :
Very nice. Good group.
Group?
Yeah. They went that way.
Thanks, Demons.
You betcha.
Enjoy Hell, y'all.
Thanks, demons.
Have a good time, boys.
I know that's strange.
....what is that, A Robot?
Yeah, that's A Robot in Hell.
Thea?
Billie? - Thea? - Billie!
Kelly, Daughter of Rufus :
No! Apology not accepted, Mother.
Bill :
Kelly?
Kelly, Daughter of Rufus :
Ah! Bill and Ted are here.
Did it work, Mom?
Yeah. That's what I thought.
Where are they?
Kelly, Daughter of Rufus :
They're that way.
Android Dennis :
I'm Dennis Caleb McCoy.
Kelly, Daughter of Rufus :
I am so... No! No.
Oh, yeah. This is way worse than
The Christmas incident.
And you named him ‘Dennis’?
After my ex?
Get outta here!
Thea! Billie!
Billie! Thea!
Dads!
Dads!
How're you doin'?
Well, you know,
We're Dead.
And We're in Hell.
But how're you doin'?
We're good!
Yeah. Look who we found.
Dad?
Ted’s Father :
Hi, Ted. I was Wrong.
I mean, You're here.
Which implies that you also
travelled through time
and that your wives
actually are Princesses.
All of which proves that
it is imperative that
You write The Song that will
unite The Entire World.
Ted :
And Save Reality.
Thea :
Wait, is that new?
Ted :
Yeah.
Ted’s Father :
Well, then, I should Help You instead of criticising you.
And I am very, very,
very sorry.
Ted :
Thanks, Dad!
Bill :
Yeah, Thanks,
Chief Logan!
Ted’s Father :
I wasn't talking to you, Bill.
Bill :
Oh. Cool.
Well, Dads, this is The Band
we put together for you.
This is Jimi Hendrix, Louis Armstrong...
And Mozart, and Ling Lun,
and Grom.
Louis Armstrong,
(Aged 25) :
A pleasure, gentlemen.
You raised two fine
young girls.
Ted :
Thank you.
And this is Kid Cudi
who's not technically
a historical figure.
Kid Cudi :
Kinda am now, I think.
Yeah. It's a great honour
to meet you all.
Yeah. Welcome to, and
we’re sorry about, Hell.
Android Dennis :
My bad.
Oh. That's Dennis Caleb McCoy.
We've met. He killed us.
Android Dennis :
I'm really sorry that I lasered you all.
And... I just need to tell you...
My name is
Dennis Caleb McCoy, and...
Thank you, Dennis.
Well, thanks for coming to get us.
How're we gonna get outta here?
We're gonna go talk to Death.
Oh. Well, isn't he still
mad at you guys?
Oh, yeah.
And we're still
mad at him.
Yeah.
Oh. Nineteen minutes.
Everyone, Follow Us.
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