Regressive Loneliness

For 27 years, I dreamt of you. 

I craved you... 

I •missed• you!

“The first kind of loneliness— loneliness for the past— is regressive. 

It attacks early in life, during adolescence or early adulthood. 

We want to return to the place we came from. 

We want the comfort and security of the good old days, the way things used to be. 

How many times do your dreams take you back to early times—the playground, the backyard, the tree you used to climb, your grade-school friends? 

This is the backward-turning loneliness, a hunger for the Garden of Eden.

There isn’t much we can do about it. We can’t go back. 

The Bible says that there is an angel with a flaming sword at the gate of Eden, forbidding reentry. 

Backward-turning loneliness is the mother complex, the wish to return to your mother’s womb. 

It is especially dangerous in men, because it becomes the will to fail, the propensity to relinquish power and regress. 

It’s the spoiler in a man, stronger than most men are able to admit. When you have an exam at school or an interview for a job and you feel terrified, this is probably The Fear of Success. 

The Enemy is Inside.

Excerpt from: "Inner Gold: Understanding Psychological Projection" by Arnie Kotler. Scribd.