FROGS

A Lion's walking through The Woods, he comes up to a Zebra and The Lion says, 

"You know something, Zebra? 

You are a ridiculous looking animal.

You're half white, half black, half Horse, half Donkey.

Look at Me — I'm Rough, I'm Tough, I'm The King of The Jungle." 

Zebra just shrugs and moves on.

The Lion comes to a Giraffe and The Lion says, 

"You know something, Giraffe? 

You are a ridiculous looking animal.

You've got a long neck and little tiny horns.

Look at Me —

I'm Rough, I'm Tough, I'm The King of The Jungle." 

Lion comes to a Frog and says, 

"You know something, Frog? 

You are a ridiculous looking animal.

You're all Green and Slimy." 

And The Frog says, 

"Hey, fuck you, I've been ill." 

You got to get your show ready.

I'm all right.

At some point, I'm gonna have to call my parents.

Do you have to? 

My father keeps a scrapbook on me.

He Googles me every morning.

He's gonna understand.

He will.

Not deep down.

No one will.

This is Who I am Now.

What happened? 

You mean how did he-- 

Why did I pose? 

Was it a bad breakup? 

I didn't even know you were going out with someone.

He was a very well-respected analyst.

We met at a Forbes party.

No, I didn't think it was a bad breakup.

He wasn't very upset about it.

But even if it had been, like, this would be okay?

No.

What The Fuck?

I Know.

I am feeling so intensely Something That I Don't Know What it Is.

Rage.

You want me to scrap you from the rundown?

Yes.

You're supposed to do a segment-- 

No, I'm not going on TV and interviewing-- the guy is-- 

He's the Chancellor of the Exchequer.

You can't —

He should have Elliot.

Okay.

Excuse me.

I bought him the camera.

It was a •good• camera.

I asked a couple of our freelance guys for help.

I miss still photography.

Though not so much lately.

Philip, it's Don Keefer again.

You've got to call me.

This is a problem.

Tomorrow morning, everyone's gonna be sourcing the WND story that's sourcing you sourcing me.

I have no idea if Simon Weingarden would make a good solicitor general or not, or even if he's being considered, but he shouldn't have this stapled to his resume just because I'm •dry•.

Call me, please, at any of my numbers.

They'll put you through.

What was that? 

Anyway —

You're feeling Rage.

I'd love it if I was.

I'd give anything to feel Rage.

It'd Trump the Humiliation and I'd be able to get up.

I think I live Here now.

What if I were able to promise you that Humiliation always turns into Rage? 

How long does that conversion take? 

How long is the evolution? 

How long does it take to get from the larva stage-- 

I fully understand what you're asking.

How long does it take? 

I guess it depends.

Like with Germany, it was 15 or 20 years.

Forget it.

But Wile E. Coyote, you know, he —

He has a fast turnaround.

I Want to Die.

I Know.